Episode 109: DSG Abuse Mini-Series: Escaping Toxic Relationships and Abuse in Faith-Based Communities with Sarah McDugal
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 574 Ratings
🗓️ 11 March 2021
⏱️ 73 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week I am continuing my podcast mini-series on abuse (which isn't so mini, after all). Joining me to discuss faith-based toxic relationships is Sarah McDugal. Sarah is a speaker, trainer, and abuse recovery coach who works exclusively with women wounded by toxic relationships in the faith community.
There are various forms of abuse that can take place within a faith community. One scenario is the church as the abuser. Another often seen is using the church as a weapon of abuse. Sarah joins me to discuss how abuse shows up within the church and what we can do to change the narrative.
While this episode deals with abuse within the faith community, Sarah makes a poignant statement about the purpose of her teachings, "My first desire is to call the faith community to be humble enough, to recognize where we failed, so that we can rebuild and we can change it. Second, if you are a woman, listening to this [episode] thinking, 'Oh my goodness this is my life,' I want you to know that there are resources. There is help…You are not alone."
Show Highlights
- Fundamental theologies of the church and how they enable abusers. (3:23)
- Why we must recognize that abuse happens in the faith community. Plus, we explore some ways it shows up. (4:00)
- The vulnerability of women within the church: most churches and faith-based communities are patriarchal in their core foundation. Those who carry the greater level of power in the majority tend to be men. (15:39)
- How marriage counseling within the church environment is damaging. (23:11)
- Why the interpretation of the biblical text matters: love and truth versus coercion and control. (36:39)
- Changing the discussion around sexuality, marriage, and sexual satisfaction for women of the Christian faith. (38:37)
- Some solutions for women who want to escape an abusive relationship within the faith community. (48:04)
- We explore the four abusive relational elements, including entitlement and control. (59:51)
Learn More About Sarah:
Sarah McDugal is a speaker, trainer, and Abuse Recovery Coach who works exclusively with women wounded by toxic relationships in the faith community. She has published three books: "One Face: Shed the Mask, Own Your Values, and Lead Wisely," "Myths We Believe, Predators We Trust: 37 Things You Don't Want to Know About Abuse in Church," and "Safe Churches: Responding to Abuse in the Faith Community."
Sarah is the founder of WILD, which offers individual coaching, recovery resources, training events, online courses, and private support groups. She emphasizes intentional prevention, responsible strategy, and holistic healing in her appearances on podcasts, TV, radio, and lectures.
Resources & Links:
Sarah's website
Systems of Abuse Chart
Parenting Resource List
5 Day Self-Compassion: Use Code KATE7 for $7 off. Offer extended to the first 100 listeners of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast.
Sarah on Facebook
Sarah on YouTube
Sarah on Instagram
Sarah on Twitter
The Thrive Fund
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 0:17.7 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate some of |
| 0:23.3 | the roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. I've been to |
| 0:29.1 | hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side of this process |
| 0:35.1 | with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 0:44.4 | Hey everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. I'm your host, |
| 0:51.5 | your Divorce Survival Guide, Katie Anthony. So today we are continuing our mini series on abuse, which is turning into a mega series, I think. |
| 1:05.1 | And today I have with me Sarah McDougall. |
| 1:08.6 | Sarah is a speaker, a trainer, and abuse recovery coach who works exclusively with women |
| 1:14.6 | wounded by toxic relationships in the faith community. |
| 1:20.4 | What? |
| 1:22.1 | Sarah has published three books. |
| 1:24.5 | One face, shed the mask, own your values, and lead wisely, myths we believe, |
| 1:30.2 | predators we trust, 37 things you don't want to know about abuse in church, and safe churches |
| 1:38.1 | responding to abuse in the faith community. I'm simply going to turn this conversation over to Sarah because she's |
| 1:46.6 | the expert in this. And our conversation, I think, is super important. So here she is. |
| 1:59.9 | Hey, Sarah. I'm so happy you're here. Thank you. I mean, it didn't take us like a year to get here |
| 2:07.0 | or anything. Like, did it? It literally did. If not, if not longer, by the way. Yeah. So I mean, |
| 2:17.3 | when you first messaged me, I had just found out, I think, the beginning of that I was looking like I might be possibly getting diagnosed with cancer. |
| 2:27.5 | And my whole life was on hold. |
| 2:29.3 | And I was just like, I don't think I can handle any podcasts right now. |
| 2:32.7 | But I love the idea. |
... |
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