Episode 101: Rebuilding Community After Divorce with Daniel Herrold
The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast
Kate Anthony
4.4 • 574 Ratings
🗓️ 14 January 2021
⏱️ 47 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Divorce comes with many harsh realizations. Once the dust starts to settle, lost friendships or friendships that no longer feel supportive can be the most painful realizations. What the hell happened to your friends? And how do you make new ones? My guest, Daniel Herrold, is the Co-Creator of DivorcedOver40, an online community that provides resources and real-life testimonials to divorcees over 40 years of age.
There are several aspects to Daniel's story that are poignant, like his deep respect and commitment to his ex-wife (the woman who stayed home for many years raising their children), as well as the story of how he created a new community with people he'd never known before.
It is my hope that by sharing stories such as Daniel's, you'll see what is possible after divorce. Sure, it may not always be rainbows and unicorns. But rebuilding a community is possible and can come pretty darn close to magical too.
Show Highlights
- Why it's important to surround yourself with people who are going through a divorce, who understand it, or who have been through it. (7:31)
- What happened to your friends? Some of the realities of friendship, including lost friendships, post-divorce. (8:12)
- Why should you focus on self-care, healing, and establishing that friendship group to help the healing process, instead of dating or thinking about your next partnership. (12:21)
- Daniel's story of recognizing the opportunity cost of his ex-wife being a stay at home mom and what that meant for them post-divorce. (19:58)
- How to put resentment and emotional baggage aside and show up with integrity. (26:30)
- Why Daniel created DivorcedOver40, building a community of nonjudgemental peers. And why it is not a matchmaking site. (36:21)
Learn More About Daniel:
Daniel is the Co-Creator of DivorcedOver40, an online community that provides resources and real-life testimonials to divorcees over 40 years of age. Daniel is a resident of Tulsa, OK and has been divorced for nearly two years now and has three daughters.
Resources & Links:
DivorcedOver40
DivorcedOver40 on Instagram
DivorcedOver40 on Facebook
Smart Dating Academy on YouTube
The Ultimate Divorce Survival Guide
Should I Stay or Should I Go Facebook Group
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the Divorce Survival Guide podcast, where we have open and honest conversations about co-parenting, separation, divorce, and the hardest question of all, should you stay or should you go. |
| 0:17.7 | I'm Kate Anthony, your divorce survival guide, and I'm here to help you navigate some of |
| 0:23.3 | the roughest waters you've ever swum in and answer some of your toughest questions. I've been to |
| 0:29.1 | hell and back, and now it's my mission in life to help you get to the other side of this process |
| 0:35.1 | with your sanity and your heart intact. |
| 0:43.5 | Hey, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Divorce Survival Guide podcast. |
| 0:49.7 | How's everyone doing? I hope you guys are settling into 2021. I mean, wow, y'all. Wow, we thought |
| 0:59.2 | this was going to be a better year so far. Oh, my God. I don't want to get into it. I am just |
| 1:07.8 | going to go straight into introducing my guest this week. |
| 1:12.6 | So my guest this week is Daniel Harold. |
| 1:15.8 | Daniel is the co-creator of divorced over 40, which is an online community that provides |
| 1:20.6 | resources and real-life testimonials to divorces over 40 years old. |
| 1:26.9 | Daniel is a resident of Tulsa, Oklahoma, and he's been |
| 1:29.7 | divorced for nearly two years now, and he has three daughters. And I'm really excited to have |
| 1:35.9 | talked to, uh, to bring this interview to you because this is an example of what's possible |
| 1:43.3 | when you get divorced. Um, so there's a couple of aspects to Daniel's story. |
| 1:49.2 | One is his incredibly deep respect and commitment to the woman who had stayed at home for years and years and years to raise their children. |
| 2:04.4 | And, you know, as I've talked about many times, the investment that women make in our households |
| 2:10.1 | in raising children is really not respected. And certainly you don't get a great return on that investment if you get |
| 2:19.1 | divorced. So Daniel, I call him the unicorn in this because he really, really honored and |
| 2:25.9 | respected his ex-wife in their divorce process. And I want you guys to hear that. I really want |
| 2:31.4 | you to hear stories like this because I think it's really important. And then also divorced over 40 is this really, really, really cool network that |
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