Episode 023: You Can't Win Anything With Kids
The Offensive
2018/19 Season
4.8 • 739 Ratings
🗓️ 4 February 2019
⏱️ 25 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Ashwood City have gone viral thanks to a racially motivated incident in a local McDonald's. Jess has arranged a trip to the Ashwood Children's Hospital to provide some much needed PR and connection with the young fanbase. In an effort to spread the joy; Patrick has arrived with some gifts from the club shop.
Paul Waggott as Patrick Nolan
Helena Doughty as Jess Tate
Adam Jarrell as Chris 'Woody' Woodall
Additional voices:
Lucinda Shaw
Rhys Tees
Episode written by:
Joel Emery
Directed by:
Adam Jarrell
Edited by:
Adam Jarrell
Executive Producer:
Joel Emery
WARNING. This podcast contains explicit language and content some listeners may find objectionable.
This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to persons living or deceased, organisations, places or events is purely coincidental. All scenarios are from the author's imagination. This podcast is protected under copyright.
Listener discretion is advised
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | With Set for Life from the National Lottery, you could win on repeat. |
| 0:06.0 | Imagine £10,000 every month for 30 years. |
| 0:10.8 | You could shred the slopes in Baldurz's air. |
| 0:13.8 | Then chill on a Caribbean beach. |
| 0:16.7 | Then taste your way through Tokyo. |
| 0:19.7 | Then back home. |
| 0:21.8 | To bolt off to |
| 0:23.3 | Set for life. |
| 0:25.3 | Play now and the National Lottery app. |
| 0:27.7 | Terms rules and procedures apply. |
| 0:28.9 | Players must be 18 or over. |
| 0:32.5 | Warning. |
| 0:33.4 | This podcast contains explicitly... |
| 0:35.5 | Sarah. Sarah. |
| 0:36.8 | There's no swearing in this one. |
| 0:39.0 | There's no... |
| 0:39.3 | Yeah, not a word. |
| 0:43.1 | Honestly, no swearing. |
| 0:46.3 | No? |
| 0:48.0 | Well, we just felt like, you know, we're overly reliant on swearing, so we're just doing one that doesn't... |
| 0:53.6 | Sorry? |
| 0:54.8 | Yeah, so you don't need to read out that bit, the explicit language. |
... |
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