This is an I-Heart podcast. Guaranteed Human. My psycho roommate cut my hair as revenge and is reporting me to the police. But it gets worse. What more are you going to do? Steal all my money? No, it's because she's turning herself in, obviously. She feels so bad. Oh my gosh. Of course. No, this is a Reddit story. These are crazy. This is right. This happened maybe five minutes ago. Also, I love how all this crazy stuff happens in the first place people go. It's like, I got a person on Reddit.

Yeah, immediately. There's a person breaking into my house. Chat. What do I? What do I do? AMA. I'm scrambling to try to figure out what to do before the police are called. I'm living off campus with a roommate that I was paired with through our college. We had a little bit of a disagreement about her paying her portion of the bills, as in I guess she's not going to pay her portion of the bills. A disagreement. And rent on time. And her boyfriend is basically living there without the landlord's permission, which violates a lease. So not only is she not paying her rent, but she's having an extra roommate in the apartment. That's double not rent paying. Yeah. You only double, baby. And I imagine that they're probably making noise after quiet hours. Oh, arts and crafts. Of course. Or like, uh, macaroni. They're just working out, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Harder. Well, everything seemed to be fine. That isn't fine, though. Like, like, like, when your roommate's not paying red. It's not fine. It's still not fine. I was going, I was going into crazy debt, but it's all good. Yeah, it's all good. Well, everything seemed to be fine later on. So we're hanging out in my room and she asked me to braid her hair. Afterwards, she offers braid mine. She goes to grab hair ties or something. I'm not paying

attention. I'm on my phone, which, you know, come on. Hang up to hang out, bro. Yeah. Well, apparently,

she grabs scissors and decided to cut my hair as revenge for pissing her off. Are you kidding me?

Which I guess, like, pissing her off means like, hey, like, could you pay the rent on time?

Literally. It's like, oh my gosh. Like how, how dare you ask for what you're owed? How dare you?

Ridiculous. What? Yeah, these psycho roommates. My goodness. I'm expecting her to braid my hair,

which was the contract, I guess, like you could sign between each other as friends in that moment.

When suddenly right next to my ear, she cuts a huge chunk of my hair off.

I freak out and instinctively turn around while batting her hand away like this.

Right?

Her hand flies into her face.

And the scissors cut her cheek deep.

And they're expensive shears, so they're very sharp.

And now she's saying, you assaulted me.

And then threatened to call the police.

Oh, man.

You know, just the reverse, Uno's, the tables that these people mentally flip is incredible.

So what, I don't know, like,

they're still bored

of this story,

but what does O.P.

...