This is an I-Heart podcast.

Guaranteed human.

My cheating ex deserved the present I got her.

What's the present?

The present of my maleficence.

Let's see.

Is that a word?

Maybe.

Maleficence?

That's like the Disney.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Maleficent. My ex broke up with me just about a year into us dating. In hindsight, she was awful. Suck it. Your ex. And I was blind to it all. She broke up with me over the phone, which seemed a little bit informal for all the time that we spent together. How long have they been together? They were almost a year. Okay, almost a year. I think anything over six months. No, anything over three months deserves at least a call. Anything over six months in person. For sure, for sure. You got to sit them down, look them right into the eyes and being like, I'm dumping your way. Fast forward a week after that, several individuals connected with her, but not each other.

Okay.

Connected with her?

Connected.

Oh, how do they connect?

Well, it all confirmed she was in fact, what?

Seeing another man.

Ah, that cheating little goundrel.

I didn't confront her about it because I realized that things just don't work out sometimes.

That's true. It was just the way she went about it that irked me. This is fair. Fair? I mean, she didn't even like, to not call after a year is pretty shitty. I think they did broke up with me over the phone. Oh, is it phone or text? Over the phone is the exact quotation. Okay. Well, to not do it in person still pretty shitty i am old

...