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Over It And On With It

EP 94: Forgiving the Seemingly Unforgivable with Jen

Over It And On With It

Christine Hassler

Mental Health, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Education

4.81.7K Ratings

🗓️ 28 June 2017

⏱️ 32 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This episode is about moving into acceptance and forgiveness. Today’s caller, Jen, is having a hard time getting to forgiveness because she doesn't believe her parents did the best they could. Her grudge may be costing her the very thing she longs for the most.

[For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode94]

One of the ways we get to forgiveness is knowing people did the best they could, even if we believe they could have done better. Knowing they did the best they could with the tools they had is one of the ways we can get to forgiveness. It can be difficult, especially when it was a parent or a loved one.

Holding on to anger, blame, and resentment is toxic. It will eat you up inside and keep you from what you want. Continuing to use the past as a scapegoat for why you don’t have want you want gives your past power. Until you move into acceptance and forgiveness, your past will infiltrate every aspect of your present and your future.

Look at the places where you are not letting love into your life. Are you focusing too much on the people that didn’t love you in the way you wanted, and missing out on all the love around you?

Would you like to connect more with me and receive a resource to help you transform into owning your purpose? Use this link, ChristineHassler.com/SpiritJunkie to enroll in Gabby Bernstein’s Spirit Junkie Masterclass by June 29th and receive access to the class, a one-hour one-on-one coaching session with me, a one-month membership to my Inner Circle Community, a download of my guided meditation CD and more.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

● Is there someone you have not been able to forgive because you truly feel what they did is unforgivable?

● Is there someone you are blaming for your not having what you want in your life?

● Do you tend to imagine worst-case scenarios and feel that things just don’t go your way in life?

● Did you grow up around addicts or as the child of addicts?

Jen’s Question:

Jen would like to forgive her mother and accept that her parents did the best they could.

Jen’s Key Insights and Ahas:

● She didn’t get the love and attention she wanted as a child.

● She wants closure with her mother who recently passed.

● She feels broken.

● She’s created the healthy family she always wanted.

● She is keeping herself from fully appreciating and accepting the love of her current family.

● She is using her past as a scapegoat.

● As a child, she had low expectations so she wouldn’t be disappointed.

● It wasn’t her job to save her parents.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

● She shouldn’t identify with the victim role, and understand she received what she needed.

● She should stop mimicking her mother’s behaviors.

● She should do projection work and let the love that exists in her current life in.

● She should have appreciation and have life-affirming and positive thoughts.

Takeaways:

● If there is someone you want to hear something from, some kind of forgiveness, write a letter to you from them. Write down all the things you wanted to hear from them and read it to yourself.

● Do projection work. Look at judgments you have towards others and see how you may be doing it in your own life, externally or internally.

● Be honest about the cost of holding onto a grudge and write down what it is keeping you from. Write down all the blessings you have in life and how you may be blinded to them because of the grudge.

● Have positive expectations and use your imagination to consider the best-case scenario.

Sponsor:

ONNIT: Get a 10% discount on your order by using this link.

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Christine Hassler Podcasts

Coaches Corner with Gabby Bernstein — Turn Your Pain Into Purpose

Inner Circle Membership Community

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

[email protected]

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

This is episode 94, Forgiving the Unforgivable with Jen.

0:08.0

Welcome to Over It and On With It.

0:10.0

I'm your host, Christine Hasler, and for over a decade I've been a life coach, speaker, and author.

0:15.0

Each week you'll hear me work directly with a caller as I coach them through a goal they want to accomplish or an obstacle they may be facing.

0:21.0

I'll provide a blend of practical and spiritual advice

0:24.3

as well as tangible actions you can apply to your own life.

0:27.6

Now let's get on with the episode.

0:38.1

Welcome back to the show everybody. This is such an important episode because probably many of you out there have someone that you know you need to forgive but but it's just really, really hard because what they did or didn't do or what happened is seemingly unforgivable.

0:51.0

You're going to appreciate this episode so be sure to listen to

0:54.6

the full coaching session and my breakdown at the end. I also want to thank those of

0:58.8

you who've left ratings and reviews. If you do leave a review, go ahead and message me on Instagram. I'm

1:05.6

Christine Hasr on Instagram. Just sharing that you left to review and

1:09.5

connecting with me. I love to hear from you. I just love connecting with all of you. And speaking of connection,

1:16.0

if you'd like more of a connection with me, meaning a 60 minute coaching session,

1:22.0

then you're going to love hearing about my bonuses for Gabby Bernstein's

1:25.0

Spirit junkie Masterclass.

1:26.9

If you miss my coaches corner with her, go back and listen to it.

1:30.0

It's awesome.

1:31.2

And she teaches an incredible online course course which is all about getting your

1:35.0

message out into the world. The cart closes tomorrow the 29th so this episode goes up

1:41.1

Wednesday the 28th. It closes Wednesday the 28th.

1:42.6

It closes tomorrow the 29th at 6 p.m. eastern time.

...

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