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Slack.com slash DHQ. Americans all across this great land from

Third Avenue in Manhattan all the way to Seventh Avenue are outraged by the comments of conservative

pastors who save the nation's recent problems or punishment for sin. In the New York Times,

a former newspaper, editor-in-chief blithering for verification, the Third published a tirade

on the op-ed page or as it's sometimes called knucklehead row. Mr. Third wrote quote,

it is absolutely disgusting that conservative preachers with laughably thin necks and narrow

faces are blaming sinfulness for everything from the absolutely not Chinese virus to the

recent mostly peaceful riots to the fact that the moon is turned to blood, to the frogs

raining down on my park avenue townhouse and the swarm of locusts that descended on our

garden devouring over $75,000 worth of transplanted saffron crocuses which buffy my Fourth wife

and I had been hoping to use to die our sailing outfits, a fetching shade of yellow before

heading out to the Hamptons for the summer. The primitive notion that these could be anything

other than natural occurrences becomes all the more offensive once you realize that I don't

even allow any wrong opinions to appear in my newspaper anymore so what sin could there

possibly be?

LGBTQMNOPXYZ activist Herman Aphrodite, a spokesman for the society in favor of screwing anything

that moves, declared the pastor's comments homophobic in a wildly shrieking voice as he was

...