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Hello and welcome to Athletical Mints with me Bob Mortimer. It's so kind of you to join us today

and as always I hope you're enjoying good health and happiness in your life. To start off with

I would like you to imagine you're lying on a deserted beach where the only sound is that of

the gentle waves breaking on the beach and the gentle breeze caressing the leaves of the palm trees

behind. You stretch out your fingers into the warm sand and dig your toes beneath the surface

to enjoy the cool damp sand beneath. Reaching into your cool box you remove a chilled salad of

crab, lobster, avocado and salsa. As you raise the plate to take your first delicious bite

a lump of herring shit, the size of a pitter bread, lands plum in the center of your salad.

Ladies and gentlemen welcome to my co-host Mr Andrew Dawson. Good morning Bob.

Oh, Mr Dawson.

His tits wet in the sun. Drift, drip, drip Dawson.

Oh, Mr Dawson. Fits like a hot crossbone. That's Mr Dawson.

His touch a caution. Hi Andy. Hi there. I forgot to sing a long, I sang a long last

minute last night. Yeah, you sang a long one. Sorry. Is that cause it's making you a bit moody

soul cake? You're a little bit stuffy. Nice, not very nice things you say about us.

It's just, you know, a cum-olus with a London and you know, no, no, it's nothing.

He was a quiz Andy. Well imagine it like him because he's because bananas but you know,

...