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The Democrat Party released its latest results after the Nevada primary announcing Bernie

Sanders is one in Iowa. Pause to let you get that joke. As Sanders continues on track

to win the party's nomination for president, a party spokesman released a statement while

running around in a circle tearing his hair and making a high-pitched babbling noise

by squealing at the same time he riffled his lips with his fingers. In fact, that was the

statement. exit polls in Nevada show Sanders far ahead of some sad old man who keeps

telling anyone to listen that he used to be vice president to Barack Obama and then

grabbing them by the arm and saying, you like Obama, don't you? Everybody loves Barack.

The gay guy came in third, then they make believe Indian, and finally the short angry

lady who pretends to be insulted all the time.

The exit pollsters asked voters two questions. One, who did you vote for and two, what the hell

were you thinking? One young man who voted for Bernie told the pollsters quote, I voted

for Bernie because I saw a tick-tock video of people eating cats in Venezuela and thought

it would be really funny if that happened here. Also, I'm not very bright. I mean, look

at me. Unquote. A suburban homemaker said quote, I voted for Bernie because Donald Trump

says rude things and before I tolerate that, I'd rather lose all my freedom and have

...