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The new economic numbers are out and now seems clear President Trump has helped create

one of the greatest economies in American history. In the wake of the good news, Democrats

are scrambling to find an effective way to campaign against him. In an interview given to Chuck

Todd and the Bowls of Castle Democrat, which sits on the mist shrouded crags atop mountain

competence, DNC Chairman Haplishmo said, quote, we thought if you journalists kept using

the word bombshell over and over, we might be able to sell the people on this cockamame

nonsense about Ukraine or wherever it is. But if they're not stupid enough to fall for

that, they're sure enough not going to vote for one of our lousy candidates.

Unquote.

The lousy candidates meanwhile have been retooling their campaign slogans in hopes of offering

voters an alternative to peace and prosperity. For instance, Joe Biden is testing out the

new slogan, sure, America is doing great, but that doesn't mean we couldn't use a

daughtering corrupt old fool in the White House. Elizabeth Warren is now using the slogan,

the economy is amazing, but I have a plan for that. And Pete Buttigieg has new signs that

read, who wants a gorgeous, graceful, kind, stylish and elegant first lady when you could

have my husband Christian and said, Bernie Sanders has been telling his rallies, quote,

...