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Slack.com slash THQ. Summers here in mosquitoes and Democrat candidates are swarming Iowa. Residents

of the Hawkeye State say they're keeping the pesky blood suckers at bay with poisonous

aerosol repellents, but mostly just slapping at the mosquitoes. In a rally on Sunday in

Cedar Rapids, a full 19 Democrats were on hand to deliver speeches, crowds gathered

outside, shouting slogans, beating drums and shaking tambourines, but still couldn't

get them to go away. Each candidate was allowed to make a speech for five minutes or an

eternity, whichever seemed shorter. Frontrunner Joe Biden skipped the event and keeping

with his campaign strategy of hiding until it's all over so that no one will find out what

he's really like, but Socialist Bernie Sanders was there and he told the crowd, quote,

"'We must reverse whatever Donald Trump has done, so where he has restored our economy,

I will impose socialism and take care of that in a big hurry.' But this is not bad socialism,

like the socialism of the Soviet Union, China, Venezuela or other real lifeplaces. This

is good socialism, like in the Norway of my imagination."

Eric Swalwell arrived on the scene with poll numbers so low he may be the first man ever

to be elected not president. A new office in which whatever power you may have had is

taken away from you and given to someone else. Swalwell announced that he is you, which

was a relief since otherwise no one would have recognized him. Other candidates included

...