This is Annie Grace and you're listening to this naked mind podcast where without judgment,

pain or rules, we explore the role of alcohol in our lives and culture.

Hi friends, it's Annie Grace, author of this naked mind and I am answering readers questions.

And today we have a question from a writer who wants to be anonymous.

She says, Hi Annie, do you have any resources on how to deal with the guilt of things you've

done during your drinking career, so to speak?

It starts to feel overwhelming when I think about how I've spent my girls first precious

years of life in a cloud or drove a car with them in it when I shouldn't have or worse.

I also feel sick about the amount of money I've wasted that could have gone towards my

family.

My very intense regret and sadness and disgust and guilt about all these things that I've

done, any advice.

So first of all, I would say that all the research that I've done and all the experts agree

that guilt, regret and remorse are very, very good things.

They are things that while they don't feel good, bring you awareness and give you the

capacity and the desire and the will to change.

So we're going to talk about the difference between guilt and regret and remorse and

a very narcissistic self-centered, self-loathing which ends up being completely counterproductive.

So first let's talk about guilt.

So guilt can be really valuable because it encourages our moral compass.

And what guilt is, is a feeling that you want to do something better, you want to compensate,

you want to give recompense to somebody you've wronged or somebody you loved.

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