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Sources say Vice President Joe Biden is close to deciding whether to run for president.

A Biden presidential victory would be historic, marking the first time a complete idiot

has won the White House. While liars, crooks and fools have occasionally occupied the

Oval Office in the past, there has never before been a president who couldn't find his backside

with a map and a flashlight. Low IQ voters across the country are reacting with excitement

to the prospect of a Biden campaign. New York mayor Bill de Blasio, for instance, said,

quote, short of electing a limp money, a farm animal or a lump of coal, giving Joe the

presidency would be the nearest thing to putting an absolute no-nothing in charge of the

country. And that's a true step toward greater tolerance for total ignoramuses or maybe

it's ignoramite. Other dumbbells have already begun organizing into packs for the Vice

President, including groups such as CBS News viewers for Biden, climate change alarmists

for Biden and college activists for shouting down anyone who disagrees with Biden. Mel Gooney,

president of the Stupid People's Organization for the Advancement of I Forget What, said,

quote, it's about time an utter moron had a chance to show what he can do to this country.

The news media promised us we'd get blithering idiots if we voted for Dwight Eisenhower, Ronald

Reagan and George W. Bush, but we were betrayed when they turned out to be really smart people

...