Democrats are arguing over a proposed resolution to condemn anti-Semitism.

Older Democrats feel the resolution is necessary to get those damn Jews off their backs,

while younger Democrats feel the resolution will hamper their ability to disguise their

deep hatred of Jews in the guise of denouncing Israel.

Minnesota Congresswoman Ilhan Omar explained her position to an informal gathering of pipe-bomb

manufacturers saying, quote, although I am only a freshman Congresswoman, I am a veteran

Jew-hater and have already perfected the practice of lightly valing my anti-Semitism in insanely

illogical comments comparing the free and peaceful nation of Israel to terror slave states throughout

the Middle East. This resolution would force me to issue yet another meaningless apology

before going right back to what I was doing, and frankly, I just haven't got time for that.

Unquote. In an interview with CNN anchorwoman Shapley Nudnik,

Mealy Mouth Chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, Elliott Mealy Mouth, said, quote,

while I am strongly committed to punishing anti-Semitism in all its forms, I have no intention of

stripping Congresswoman Omar of her seat on my committee because that would appear to punish

anti-Semitism in one of its forms. Instead, I want to denounce all hateful people, including

jihadophobes, transophobes, claustrophobes, people who look away during the graphic male

sex scenes in that Spartacist TV show, people who say they hate tomatoes, but love pizza,

which makes absolutely no sense. And of course, anyone who hates ducks.

Who on earth could hate those cute fluffy little waterfalls that bring so much joy to any child

who has a loaf of bread and a death wish? Unquote. In a statement issued to a cave somewhere in

Pakistan, Congresswoman Rashida Taliyeb blame President Trump for the controversy, saying, quote,

Trump cleverly hides his bigotry behind his token Jewish grandchildren, who by the way are

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