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Slack.com slash DHQ. With President Trump's popularity polls sagging,

Democrats are lining up to run for President in record numbers. So far, Democrats who have

announced their 2020 candidacy include the state of Massachusetts, the editorial board

of the New York Times, six homeless guys from San Francisco who need to get into the White

House to use the bathroom, and 50 of the Mexican field workers on Nancy Pelosi's Napa Valley

estate who say being President might be a tough job, but it would sure be working for

the slave driver. With so many candidates in the race, Democrats will be offering a wide

range of political positions from full-fledged communism, which will finally give the ordinary

working guy a fighting chance to be dragged off in the middle of the night by the secret

police to a more moderate socialism, which will allow all of us to find out what cats taste

like when you roast them over a trash fire. Among the less well-known Democratic candidates

are the attractive young Minnesota State Senator Muhammad Jihad Muhammad, who has been

testing out the slogan, I don't want to say it's the Jews, but it's the Jews. There's

also Black transgender candidate Latisha Angelica Dubois Jones, formerly known as Jack

Scarpetty, who says her experience of transitioning from an Italian teamster from a slum in Brooklyn

to a Black woman from an imaginary village in Africa has taught her everything she needs

to know about delusional mental illness. As for more traditional candidates, there's

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