The American Association of Journalistic Mendacity is issued new guidelines for the coverage

of demonstrations.

The guidelines came in the wake of last weekend's marches in which thousands of left-wing activists

assaulted or insulted or threatened to kill police officers, journalists, passers-by, puppy

dogs, innocent children, President Trump, and the entire United States of America.

Whereas evil fascist white supremacists pleaded with their 20 followers to cease their

hateful ways and live in peace and harmony with all mankind.

The A.A.J.M. said the news coverage tended to slightly favor the peaceful and virtually

non-existent white supremacists by showing them to be peaceful and virtually non-existent,

while the violent leftist multitudes were shown unfairly as being violent and multitudes.

This is in violation of the organization's credo, first, spread no information that makes

leftist look bad.

Second lie like a house of fire.

According to the new guidelines, journalists shall refer to non-violent fascists as violent

fascists, whereas violent leftists shall be referred to as anti-hate groups.

Journalists who get knocked to the ground and kicked by peaceful anti-hate groups shall

report that journalists were caught up in clashes, whereas journalists who are asked

directions by white supremacists shall report that we are costed by violent fascists.

Demonstrations in which leftists cause violence and no right-wingers appear whatsoever shall

be taken as evidence that we live in a divided country.

As opposed to an indication that we live in a great country under attack by violent leftist.

And the fact that no one can find enough fascists to play around a fascist bridge should

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