EP 552: Reader Question - How do I get over the fear of being kind to myself?

This Naked Mind Podcast

Annie Grace

Mental Health, Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness

4.7 • 2.7K Ratings

🗓️ 24 December 2022

⏱️ 4 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

One of the common threads that ties so many of us together on this journey is a cycle of blame and shame. We falsely believe that by beating ourselves up enough it will force us to make a change. Listen as Annie and Scott share why the opposite of that is true and how to get over the fear of being kind to yourself.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This episode is sponsored by the Live Alcohol Experiment, a 30-day science-based and compassion-led
0:05.5	journey where you learn to develop a healthier relationship with alcohol without relying on
0:10.0	willpower. Why? Because the truth is that willpower runs out. Instead, you learn how to focus on
0:16.1	what you gain, not what you give up. So you can feel good about the decisions you make without shame
0:21.1	or guilt. With a 30-days-of-video training, virtual daily coaching, and a private and supportive
0:26.5	community, you get that now so much more. Join us today to get happier, healthier, and to take back
0:32.8	your life. Your Live Alcohol Experiment starts on the first, so sign up at livealcoholexperiment.com.
0:41.1	I'm so afraid that if I'm kinder to myself, I will just keep letting myself off the hook.
0:47.0	How, and I want to, I'm asking this question because we covered this, but I want to reiterate it,
0:51.3	how do I move beyond the shame and the fear of kindness to myself. You got to just try it.
1:01.8	I mean, that's the reality is you've got to say which problem do I want? Do I want the problem?
1:06.7	I've maybe let myself off the hook and I'll end up on the couch covered in Dorito dust.
1:12.1	You know, with a six pack of empties around my feet, or do I want the problem of I'm just going
1:17.9	to continue like this fly and keep going against the glass and maybe exhaust myself before I find
1:25.6	freedom. And now I want to like just make a point here, this feels weird, right? Like what I'm
1:32.8	getting in this question is that letting myself off the hook feels weird. Of course it does.
1:36.8	Of course it does. It's new, right? This might feel impossible. Yeah, yeah, it might because that's
1:45.4	what we've been programmed to believe. And so what Annie said is really about taking that first
1:51.7	little step, right, approaching it with curiosity, admitting this feels weird, admitting I don't know
1:58.2	how to be nice myself. Like when I quit drinking, I did not know how, excuse me, to let myself off the hook.
2:05.3	I had no idea, but it happens one little step at the time and being okay with the fact that it's
2:12.9	uncomfortable, being okay with the fact that this is new, that's how you can do it. And you only
	...

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