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Marriage Therapy Radio

Ep 376 Dr. Shannon Curry on Trust, Triangulation, and Telling the Truth

Marriage Therapy Radio

MTR

Self-improvement, Society & Culture, Therapy, Health & Fitness, Marriage, Relationships, Mental Health, Education

4.6 • 690 Ratings

🗓️ 10 June 2025

⏱️ 37 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Zach sits down with Dr. Shannon Curry—clinical psychologist, couples therapist, and founder of the Curry Psychology Group—for a nuanced discussion about what happens when couples “team up” against their therapist in session. Drawing on her forensic background and deep clinical insight, Shannon explores the subtle dynamics of triangulation, conflict avoidance, and the emotional strategies people learn early in life to stay safe in relationships.

Together, Zach and Shannon talk about how the therapeutic space can trigger old wounds, what it takes to speak hard truths in love, and why being emotionally honest is often the most generous thing a partner can do. With warmth, curiosity, and real-life anecdotes, this episode speaks directly to the complexity of partnership—and the courage it takes to grow within one.

Key Takeaways

  • When Couples Turn on the Therapist
    Shannon shares how one partner will sometimes rush to “protect” the other during difficult feedback, forming an unconscious alliance that derails growth—and puts the therapist in the role of the enemy.

  • Emotional Manipulation as a Survival Strategy
    Many clients learn passive or controlling behaviors in childhood because direct expression wasn’t safe. These aren’t character flaws—they’re adaptive tools that once worked.

  • Conflict as a Mirror
    The messiest moments in therapy often reflect old attachment wounds. Shannon emphasizes that when conflict emerges in session, it's not a sign of failure—it’s a signal of something important beneath the surface.

  • The Generosity of Truth
    Zach proposes a compelling reframe: that emotional honesty—even when it’s uncomfortable—is a gift of generosity in relationships. Shannon agrees, calling truth-telling a spiritual value in her work.

  • The Truth Will Set You Free... Eventually
    Sometimes growth hurts. Shannon shares a quote from her boarding school that sticks with her: “The truth will set you free—but first it will make you miserable.”

Guest Info

Dr. Shannon Curry

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, everybody, welcome.

0:03.3

And thank you for listening to this episode of Marriage Therapy Radio.

0:05.5

My name is Zach Brittle.

0:06.9

I'm here this week and next and the next with Dr. Shannon Curry.

0:11.7

We had Shannon on the podcast a couple years ago.

0:14.0

That was episode 264.

0:15.9

So you may have heard of her then.

0:17.4

I first discovered Shannon on YouTube, actually.

0:20.2

I was kind of obsessed for a minute with

0:21.9

the Johnny Depp, Amber Heard situation. And Shannon was featured as a witness in that situation.

0:30.1

And I don't know, I got fed a clip or something of her just sort of interacting with one of the

0:34.5

attorneys in that case. And I was like, whoa, this lady is smart. She's cool. She's got it all together. I love talking to Shannon because she's one of these people who sort of what you see is what you get, which is always refreshing. And just whip smart, brilliant, has lots of cool insights into therapy that are helpful for me. We tend to compare notes from time to time. And we just enjoy talking to each other. So I asked her to come on, hang out with me on Marriage Therapy Radio for a little bit. She'll be our sort of guest co-hosts for the next few weeks, and I think you'll enjoy her. I'm grateful for the opportunity to have smart people come on to compare notes with. I'm grateful for a lot of things these days. We got to teach with Laura this last weekend. That was really fun. We got to spend the weekend together. We got pedicures, just in case you were wondering. We had Mary's graduation party on Friday, and she graduates tonight from high school, which is amazing. That will have happened by the time you guys listen to this podcast. But that's what's going on on my end. And then my birthday is coming up. It's Friday, Friday the 13th, which is amazing. And I'm going to wake up my blog on Friday. And if you want to stay in touch with stuff that I'm writing, it's literally called stuff I write.com. You can subscribe. And I'm going to start rolling out some content that is less marriage related than the stuff that I do here, but it gives me an

1:44.7

opportunity to play and dream and speculate about the stuff that I'm paying attention to.

1:48.3

So that's cool.

1:49.4

If you want to get me a birthday present, roll over to stuff I write.com, become a subscriber,

1:53.2

and I will return the gift by filling your inbox with things that I think about and stuff

1:59.0

that I write.

2:00.1

Between now and then, I am grateful for you.

2:02.4

I thank you for listening to Marriage Therapy Radio. This is a very cool conversation. Stick around.

2:08.7

I was going to tell you I just blew up my bathroom. I'm a bathroom now attached to my office in our new

2:14.0

office. Sweet. Yeah, this is definitely going on the podcast.

2:20.3

By the way, can I share the last two texts you sent me?

...

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