Yale graduate students are on a symbolic hunger strike in order to force the university to give them more stuff.

Now you may ask, what's a symbolic hunger strike?

And also, when did Yale start accepting idiot clowns at their university?

Is there some kind of new idiot clown department where they train idiot clowns so they can be in the stupid circus for stupid people?

Well, I'm not sure about the answer to all those other questions, but a symbolic hunger strike is a hunger strike where you don't eat unless you get hungry.

Then you eat.

So, let's say after waking up like an normal graduate student at the crack of 10 am, you smoke a quick doobie and then motor skateboard down to blue state coffee.

The socially conscious cafe, where you enjoy a free-range egg and bacon sandwich on a sesame bagel in the self-righteous knowledge that some portion of the price will be donated to the New Haven Pride Center.

To make sure the gay people at Yale don't run out of pride.

Because we wouldn't want that.

Then after completing your breakfast with a healthful yogurt parfait topped with gluten free almond granola, you motor board down to the strike line where you heroically don't eat a single thing until it gets to be around noon when you start in feeling just a tad peckish.

And then it's off for a quick pizza before you get down to the hard work of being a graduate student, which is grading papers and teaching a class if it happens to be Thursday.

And lest you think the symbolic suffering of this symbolic strike is not an a symbolically worthwhile cause. Let me point out that for all this effort you're putting it molding the minds of the young while simultaneously working on your thesis entitled intersectional trends of transgender oppression in last week's episode of the walking day.

You only receive a stipend of over $30,000 a year plus the full 40 grand a year for tuition plus health care and other benefits amounting to nearly $400,000 a year for doing what you do, which is pretending to be on a hunger strike.

But all this is beside the point.

You see, a modern graduate student at Yale may be the single most privileged human being to have ever existed in the whole long course of history, including those ancient Roman guys who used to lie around on cushions and drink goblets of wine while pinching dancing girls.

So you have to stage a symbolic hunger strike to demonstrate that you are so symbolically courageous in the face of symbolic oppression that you're almost some kind of symbolic hero who symbolic actions symbolize the highest symbols of symbolic human achievement.

In other words, you're a leftist symbolically courageous in the symbolic fight against symbolic hardships that don't exist.

So grad students of Yale, we hear at the Andrew Clayvin show support your symbolic hunger strike.

And if you're headed to lunch, pick up a pizza for me. After all, it's not like you're busy doing anything else.

Trigger warning, I'm Andrew Clayvin and this is the Andrew Clayvin show.

I'm a hunky-dunky life is to get you boom. There's a ring in all the same hunky-dunky.

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