Ep. 201: Who were you 'getting to know' over those texts?

The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

Natalie Lue

Relationships, Society & Culture, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.9 • 867 Ratings

🗓️ 23 October 2020

⏱️ 47 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

While it isn't a new issue, disappointment about online interactions not blossoming into something bigger and better in real life seems to have been heightened by the pandemic, thanks to it limiting our social interactions. Natalie talks about the importance of managing our imagination and expectations so that we don't end up falling for a hologram or setting ourselves up for a fall.

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Transcript

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0:00.0	I'm Natalie Lou and you're listening to the baggage reclaim sessions.
0:08.0	Hello hello. How are you doing?
0:11.0	It's back to Just Old Me this week.
0:14.0	Thank you to everybody who listened in for episode 200.
0:20.0	And for the lovely messages, and was thrilled to get your feedback. I think he quite enjoyed
0:25.2	being on and is already looking forward to when I invite him on for his next visit.
0:32.3	What am I talking about today? Well, something I have been hearing a lot about recently is people whether it's in a dating or friendship capacity feeling
0:49.0	as though they've been messed around, duped, used by someone that they were getting to know, let's call
0:58.9	it online.
0:59.9	So it could be DM in via Instagram or Facebook or yeah maybe it'll move over to text and
1:09.0	there may be some calls like FaceTime Skype or yeah just a standard phone call. Now the
1:16.0	thing is this is not a new problem. It really isn't. This has been in my inbox pretty much every day for the best part of 15 years.
1:26.4	But what has shifted these stories over the last several months is of course the pandemic and it's almost as if people have
1:37.0	assumed that us now being forced to limit you know our human to human in-person contact and be more online meant that
1:47.5	everyone got the memo the memo being right well we're gonna be more more truthful now we're going to be more
1:54.0	authentic we're going to be ourselves and we're also going to know what we want of
1:58.2	course we did not get that memo things have basically continued as they have before just with the added layer of
2:06.8	yep the pandemic. So even though this is an age old problem. So people, yeah, sometimes misrepresenting themselves, and us, yes, sometimes painting a picture in our mind that is very very different to the reality of someone or something.
2:27.5	And these age-old problems have been exacerbated by technology for some time now. Some people have taken, what do we call
2:37.3	it, a cognitive leap where, yeah, we've assumed that the pandemic makes a virtual interaction more real than it was before the pandemic.
2:54.0	That we're actually getting to know the person
2:58.0	the way that we think we're getting to know the person.
	...

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