meta_pixel
Tapesearch Logo
Log in
Help Me Be Me

Ep 198: Fear of Conflict: Getting comfortable voicing your needs in your relationship

Help Me Be Me

Cloud10

Health & Fitness

4.81.9K Ratings

🗓️ 24 May 2023

⏱️ 43 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

This is about growing comfortable asking for what you want, and also comfortable when someone else does not give that to you. Really stepping back in that moment and accepting that at face value. Not taking another person personally and also not getting pulled into inner narratives around their response can result in a total night and day outcome in how you experience your life. This is also about setting healthy boundaries in relationships specifically in how you demand good treatment for yourself. I would say this episode may resonate more with those who consider themselves recovering codependents, like myself. Standing up for yourself and your needs is an important habit to keep, so you can keep yourself and your relationship safe. I don’t mean that everything has to be a fight– this is not about focusing on the bad things over the good things. This is really about taking the stigma out of bringing up how you’d like to be loved and cared for so you can continue to be healthy in your relationship. Many issues that come up in our intimate relationships are co-created by the fears and unmet needs of our past. This episode will also give you some awareness around taking in the other person’s response, so you don’t take it personally if/when they respond badly to voicing personal issues. Because often half of what another person perceives is their projection of their own past unmet needs. Support our sponsors this week! Check out RocketLanguages.com Sign up for a free trial today and discover the joy of speaking Spanish, French, Italian, German, Japanese, Chinese, and many more languages like a local. Use the promo code HELPMEBEME to get up to $200 off on any language. Visit rocketlanguages.com to get started today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Help me be me is self-help for people who hate self-help hosted by me, Sarah May.

0:06.8

What I talk about on this show is my personal opinion and it's not a substitute for professional

0:11.2

help.

0:12.2

Take what helps and leave the rest.

0:14.0

If you're suffering, please call 911 or your local emergency services.

0:23.9

Hi everyone, it's Sarah May Bates and this is an episode all about standing up for yourself

0:31.8

in relationships and this is really about asking for what you want and what you need and

0:37.4

what you deserve and setting healthy boundaries and knowing that that is a loving and healthy

0:42.1

thing to do.

0:44.0

And this is especially for my friends out there who would consider themselves recovering

0:49.4

co-dependence because it can be really painful and scary to voice your needs or draw boundaries

0:57.4

and draw lines when it comes to relationships because it brings up so much guilt and

1:02.9

fear and it can be worse to feel that pain than to actually just not say anything at all.

1:11.1

With that, setting healthy boundaries and relationships, specifically in how you demand good

1:16.0

treatment for yourself and really this is about growing comfortable asking for what

1:21.1

you want and also comfortable when someone else cannot give that to you.

1:26.4

And what I mean by that is just like being able to step back in that moment and accept

1:31.8

that at face value and not take the other person personally because I think we tend to

1:36.6

relive all of what that means if that person doesn't do the thing we want them to do or

1:43.0

feel the thing we want them to feel.

1:45.5

It can feel like it's retrygaring all of this loss and longing from a long time ago

1:52.2

that doesn't necessarily belong to the current situation.

...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Cloud10, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Cloud10 and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.

Copyright © Tapesearch 2025.