Hi, my name is Glenn from Infants on Thrones, and he'll never believe what happened to me.

One night as I was kneeling down to prey, I bumped my knee on a really hard rock.

And when I looked down to get rid of that damn thing, that damn thing was glowing!

So I put it down in my crotch and stuffed my face down real close and

holy cow you guys you'll never guess all the groovy things I can see now. What you say anymore? This is my life.

Go ahead with your own life.

Leave me alone.

This is infants on Thrones.

Minnesot.

The New South.

The New Book of Abraham Infant Styles, Chapter 2.

Hey everybody, remember me?

It's the writings of the real Abraham, revealed to me through my real peepstone, Erastus.

And it's finally time to continue our story with Chapter 2.

But first, let's recap chapter one, shall we?

Chapter one, the real writings of real Abraham while he was really in Egypt,

really written by his own real hand upon real papyrus.

He was born and raised an er of the Caldes

thousands of miles and thousands of years away from Pharaoh in Egypt

and yet they still somehow had the same religion and the same priests and the same gods, even

the made-up ones.

Abraham was good. Everyone else was bad. They tried to sacrifice him, but God stepped in and saved him.

...