Ep 182: How much should my friend risk giving up to fall in love?

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Hilary Rushford

Arts, Entrepreneur, Fashion & Beauty, Fashion, Deanstreetsociety, Entrepreneurship, Stylist, Business

4.9 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 11 October 2023

⏱️ 68 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What advice would you give? Would you want?

The last two weeks while in Italy, I was swept away in the best romantic story.

A dear friend unexpectedly met someone while traveling internationally far from home and texted, “I might have met my husband.”

The wrinkle is that a life with him means a major fork in the road, leaving possibly forever things she’s loved, and for various reasons the decision is going to be made quickly.

When you have a major life decision, how can you be confident you won’t regret whatever you choose?

Over hours of voice messages back and forth I reflected:

The advice I’m giving her is so much different than I would have 10 years ago.
What I learned from my IVF, surrogacy, and book journey that gave me wisdom.
What we really want to know, and are never going to.
How to avoid self-shame/blame if it doesn’t work out.
The biggest difference between taking risks in your teens/20’s vs your mid-30’s and beyond

The questions I guided her through, I found myself asking myself in the very different scenarios I’m walking through personally today.

This is the grown-women’s approach to love and life choices that (thank goodness) has less draining drama and more delightful drama that makes life exciting yet empowering.

Curious to hear on Instagram @HilaryRushford what advice you’d give after you listen? If you share it on Stories tag me so I can see!

Transcript

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0:00.0	You're welcome. What was that? You're welcome with Hillary rush for it. Say it again. You're welcome.
0:12.5	In advance. Hello friends. We are back in Brooklyn from a beautiful trip in Italy that I am just so
0:22.6	incredibly grateful that we got to go on. I will talk a little bit more in the PS about one of the new
0:29.4	practical places that we found and fell in love with. This trip felt like in some ways with everything
0:38.2	happening behind the scenes in our lives, it felt like the worst time to be going on a trip. And if
0:42.4	we hadn't booked all these things that were non-refundable, I think we might have been like, you know what?
0:46.8	Let's just maybe take this another time. And yet I also think it was so deeply needed. And
0:54.6	something that we talk about more inside my healing burnout, of course, is the importance of
1:01.0	rest, the importance of healing our nervous system, the different types of rest. And truly,
1:09.0	I think Jeremy and I are just both so refreshed and renewed, specifically from the second part
1:15.0	of our trip. The first part we were working remotely. The second part was true vacation. And
1:19.3	we've not been on a trip vacation in over nine months. And I now I feel it so much. I think that's
1:28.0	the thing about burnout is that it can really sneak up on you. And it's not like you're going to
1:35.6	fall off a cliff. You're either burned out or you're totally healthy. It's really a spectrum. And
1:41.4	we can maybe feel more burned out in a day than another day or in an area of our lives. But
1:48.6	one of the hallmarks of burnout is discouragement. And I think I didn't even realize that I
1:56.4	was feeling discouraged in some areas. I definitely could sense it in Jeremy until we rested.
2:02.4	And then I could just sense the difference in our conversations at dinner each night. And I
2:07.2	realized we are both feeling more positive, more optimistic. And that is a sign of burnout. And
2:13.8	actually next month, I've got an assessment for you on how to get your burnout score,
2:21.9	sort of how to go through this assessment and get a sense of, am I burned out or not? What are
2:27.6	the hallmarks that I should be looking for? But I'll tell you one right now, is that sense of
	...

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