Ep 131: Jeff
Improvised Star Trek
USS Sisyphus
4.9 • 573 Ratings
🗓️ 15 February 2016
⏱️ 23 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
An impressive new crewman impresses the crew, impressively.
Improvised November 8th from a suggestion by Mark Dean Quinn via Facebook
Edited by Roger Payton
Featuring
Griffen Eckstein as Lt. Cdr. Fritz Fassbinder, Lt. Leopold Lackey
Chris Johnson as Jeff
Sean Kelley as Lt. Cdr. Crick Watson, Ensign Dice
Eli Mandel as Rip Stiply, Lt. Jeremy Swanson, Ensign Cards
Nick Wagner as Ensign/Lt. Ch'arles Lorem, an Ensign T'bl'T'p'G'm'ng
Mary Cait Walthall as Dr. Zarlene Zonalzon, Ensign Nerf
Matt Young as Captain Julius Valentine Baxter, Ensign Greg, Sally, Ensign Sports
Sponsored by The Red Eye, a member of the Chicago Podcast Coop
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | This episode of Improvised Star Trek is sponsored by The Red Eye, a member of the Chicago podcast co-op. |
| 0:05.4 | There are better things to do during your commute than stock your X on Facebook. |
| 0:09.0 | Do Chicago better with the Red Eye mobile app. |
| 0:11.4 | Get it from the app store or Google Play. |
| 0:17.2 | All right, Captain, long-range scans of that nebula are done. Before I go off shift, have you guys met Ensign Jeff? Oh, yeah. The buff guy? Yeah. I was super impressed. Yes. Like right off the bat. Is that his last name? It's just Jeff, I think. First and last name. It's kind of a classic Earth name. I think that he would also have a last name and we would call him like Ensign, Tuilliger or whatever. |
| 0:42.3 | He had everybody from science over his place for dinner last night. |
| 0:46.3 | Oh really? |
| 0:47.3 | He is a classically trained Japanese sushi chef. |
| 0:50.3 | Really? |
| 0:51.3 | Like Earth sushi. |
| 0:52.3 | Jeff's a chef. |
| 0:53.3 | Chef Jeff. |
| 0:55.4 | Maybe he'll take my job. |
| 0:58.0 | What are you doing on the bridge? |
| 0:59.2 | I'll go. |
| 1:08.0 | Look, I read his name on the incoming staff list, but I didn't know he was already planning dinners with the whole science staff. |
| 1:10.6 | I mean... Oh, guys, I'm sorry, I'm late |
| 1:12.6 | for my shift. That's all right. My weekly two-hour shift on the bridge, I ran into |
| 1:17.6 | Ensign Jeff. Oh, yeah. We were just talking about him. Oh, really? Oh, he totally fixed, like, |
| 1:23.9 | everything in engineering. Really? It was amazing, yes. And by everything, I mean, he feng shored the shit out of engineering. Oh, wow. What color shirt does he wear? I've seen him in a different color every single time. Are you kidding me? He's a multifaceted officer. Yeah, he had a blue on the first time I met him. Yeah. And then he had the yellow on down in engineering. Yeah, that makes sense. His major at Starfleet Academy was Renaissance Man. And he's super buff. |
| 1:47.8 | Well, I should meet this Ensign Jeff? I mean, you're probably supposed to, like as captain. We had you covered up on the last Ensign orientation meeting. We used the Captain Baxter puppet to introduce them to you and what you look like and what your general attitude is like. Captain Baxter to Ensign Jeff. Bung-Bun-Bun-Wa. Hey, how are you? I'm doing great. How are you today? I'm doing just fine. Oh, it is a beautiful day, isn't it, Captain? Oh, it is a beautiful day. Look, I just wanted to invite you to dinner in my quarters tonight. Special Captain's dinner tonight. |
| 2:17.8 | I'd like that. |
... |
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