Ep: 11 Dealing with Codependency
The Betrayed, The Addicted, The Expert
Ashlynn Mitchell, Brannon Patrick, Coby Mitchell
4.8 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 24 April 2017
⏱️ 26 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
We are glad you found our season 1 episodes where we share early parts of our processes of learning about and exploring the impacts of betrayal on our relationship, and the challenges of healing both sides of the relationship after sex addiction and infidelity.
Our journey has taken us a long ways from the time we recorded these episodes, but many have still found help and hope for healing in the information. We hope you always seek healing first for yourself, and where possible for the relationship, though staying together or choosing divorce or separation can occur at the point of betrayal and at times even after healing from betrayal and addictions.
If you would like support in healing from betrayal we’d invite you to look at our program https://www.beyond-enough.com/beyondbetrayal
It is not a program about staying together or leaving your partner, but rather finding the healing we need as an individual who has been made aware of our partner cheating.
If you would like support from a licensed therapist contact Brannon’s office at www.utahtherapy.org
To find out about Ashlynn’s groups https://www.thisisashlynn.com/mentoring
To get support from Coby check out www.growwithcoby.com
Thanks for your continued support for the podcast throughout all of our journey.
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | What's up everybody? This is the Betray, the addicted, and the expert. My name is Brannon and I am the expert. |
| 0:11.0 | And I'm Ashland and I was the portrayed. |
| 0:13.4 | And I'm Kobe, the recovering addict. |
| 0:16.4 | What you're gonna get is three unique perspectives on recovery |
| 0:21.8 | and tools for hope and healing. |
| 0:26.0 | Okay, so today we're going to talk about a dirty word in recovery. |
| 0:32.0 | Oh boy. |
| 0:32.8 | And so hang in there when I say it and please listen through. |
| 0:39.4 | And so we're talking about codependency today. |
| 0:42.0 | And the reason I say it's a dirty word is it's |
| 0:45.6 | been turned into that in the recovery community in some ways and let me explain why and |
| 0:51.9 | then we'll get into what it is and why we need to talk about it. |
| 0:57.0 | So when I started doing this years ago, clients would come in and the spouse or the betrayed would be told that they're a codopendant. |
| 1:08.0 | You're a co addict, you're a codopendant. |
| 1:10.0 | Basically, you're just as sick as he is and you need help and treatment just as much as he does. |
| 1:16.5 | Oh my gosh talk about like throwing it at the trade. |
| 1:20.9 | Oh my gosh. Right. And so after a while there was almost a backlash of like, and a woman by the name of Barbara Stephens wrote a really good book called Your Sexually Addicted Spouse, and she just disputed |
| 1:36.2 | co-dependency. And that, coupled with some other professionals coming out and saying, it's not codependency, it's betrayal trauma. |
| 1:46.8 | It led to this kind of feeling of we don't even talk about codependency, we don't bring it up because it's not |
| 1:54.8 | codependency it's betrayal trauma and it because because saying you're codependent |
| 2:02.3 | or this is codopendency kind of it it |
| 2:06.0 | what was the connotation of codependency that it made it such a dirty word well well |
... |
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