Kill a little time for the child within, you don't be afraid to be young and free

Under the locks and throw away the keys and take coffee shoes and sex and run you

I'm Jesse Thorn, America's radio sweetheart, and I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective

And this is Jordan, Jesse, GO!

This week on Jordan, Jesse GO, things for which the audience has ruined them for you, things, with Scott O'Huckerman! Let's go!

It's Jordan, Jesse GO, I'm Jesse Thorn, America's radio sweetheart

I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective

Wonderful guest with us on this program, very excited about this, Jordan, I could not be more excited!

I know I've described guests before as a get

Right, sure, no, you've used that word before, no doubt about it

It's been bullshit up until now, this is an actual get

This is a real get, I mean this is going to change, I think this might change the trajectory of Jordan, Jesse GO

In the same way that getting Hugh Grant after the prostitute incident, change the trajectory of the Jay Leno tonight show

And then HBO will make a TV movie about it

Right, exactly, and in this case, I think I'm Jay Leno, our guest Scott O'Huckerman is Hugh Grant, and you're the prostitute

Great, I was going to say I wanted to be the prostitute, but you were with me on that

Hello boys

Can I just say two things? First of all, I love how real and sincere you are

And these introductions, secondly, the prostitute institute, that's what you were going to say

I'd love to attend there at some point

Would you be a guest speaker?

Maybe an artist in residence

...