This is a Headgun Podcast.

Hello, all you nasty freaks.

Welcome back to Root Tales of Magic.

You're not a cop, are you?

You have to tell me if you're a cop.

Welcome back to Root Tales of Magic.

The only podcast that gives you cirrhosis of the liver.

Our heroes have breached the soaking valk, excuse me,

soaking mothers, defenses, and journeyed into the belly of the beast

to write the wrongs they inadvertently caused to defend the defenseless

and to avoid having to go all the way around the soaking mother,

which would have been a deadly journey, by the way.

Not gonna come up, but I put an immortal crazy guy with a sword

in the woods for them if they went around.

And that would have been a real pain in the ass to deal with.

His name, Josephus Poop, at this very moment,

he's fucking a tree and screaming.

But our camera has no interest in him.

And instead, joins our heroes in Scrum South,

the literal underground headquarters of the figurative

underground resistance.

We politely sneak up on them as they go over their plan

...