Emotional Infidelity: The Warning Signs | Ep. 260
Awesome Marriage Podcast
Dr. Kim Kimberling
4.9 • 813 Ratings
🗓️ 9 October 2018
⏱️ 29 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
When it comes to an emotional affair, do you know the warning signs? This month at Awesome Marriage we are talking about emotional infidelity and trust issues.
Today Dr. Kim & Christina talk specifically about emotional infidelity and the warning signs of it. Emotional affairs are everywhere and they are, unfortunately, very easy to slip into. So we have to be careful to guard our marriage from any kind of affair, including one that never gets physical. The reality is, we are ALL at risk of having an emotional affair and we should all be putting up safeguards to protect our marriage from the damage of an emotional affair.
RESOURCES
List of Warning Signs You Might Be Having An Emotional Affair:
- If you daydream about someone of the opposite sex
- If you compare someone of the opposite sex to your spouse often
- If you have ever thought of someone of the opposite sex sexually and if you begin to think of them in this way regularly
- If you are saving topics of conversation for somebody other than your spouse because, in your mind, they understand you better
- If you are sharing intimate details about your marriage with someone of the opposite sex
- If you look forward to seeing the other person more than your spouse
- You're doing things or saying things with this other person that you wouldn't want your spouse to see
- You're keeping things from your spouse
- You dress to impress this other person
- You look for opportunities to get away from your spouse and spend time with this other person
- You delete messages from this other person so your spouse won't see
- Not being content and accepting of your spouse
- You take selfies of yourself and send it this other person
- You post pictures of yourself online because you know this other person will see them and like them
SPONSORS
- Thank you to SYMBIS for sponsoring this podcast episode! SYMBIS stands for Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, the title of my good friends Drs. Les & Leslie Parrott's book, and is used by more than a million couples. And the SYMBIS Assessment is like nothing you've seen before. Dr. Kim uses it with every premarital couple that he counsels. So if you are a pastor, counselor, coach, or even marriage mentors, you won't want to miss out on this incredible tool. Go to SYMBIS.com to learn more. You'll be glad you did!
NOTEWORTHY QUOTES FROM THE EPISODE:
"If you are going outside your marriage to get something that God designed for you to have inside marriage then that's an emotional affair and it is a sin." - Dr. Kim
"When I am struggling with something I lean into God. He knows me better than anyone else." - Dr. Kim
"When you do things God's way it works, when you do it the world's way it doesn't." - Dr. Kim
"If you have any of these warning signs with someone the opposite sex then you might have to unfriend them in every single way to protect your marriage from an emotional and/or physical affair." - Dr. Kim
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Welcome to the awesome marriage podcast, a place for honest conversations about marriage and practical advice on how to have a God-honoring awesome marriage. |
| 0:09.6 | I am your podcast producer and co-host Christina Dodson. |
| 0:12.8 | On the show will be your host, Dr. Kim Kimberling. |
| 0:15.5 | Dr. Kim is a marriage counselor and has been married for over 40 years. |
| 0:19.7 | His passion is to help you strengthen your most |
| 0:22.3 | intimate relationship. This month's awesome marriage, we're talking about emotional infidelity |
| 0:28.0 | and trust issues. Today, we're going to be talking specifically about emotional affairs and the |
| 0:32.4 | warning signs of it. Emotional affairs are everywhere, and they are unfortunately very easy to slip into. |
| 0:38.7 | So we have to be careful and to guard our marriage from any kind of affair, including ones that may never even get physical. |
| 0:44.6 | The reality is we are all at risk of having an emotional affair, and we should all put safeguards up to protect our marriage from the damage and a havoc that emotional affair causes. So to kick things off, |
| 0:55.7 | Dr. Kim, what is an emotional affair? How would you define it? I think it's any time that like if I was |
| 1:03.0 | getting some emotional needs met by someone by Nancy, by someone of the opposite sex. In other words, |
| 1:08.5 | the things that God designed marriage to meet, Nancy to meet in my |
| 1:11.8 | life, I'm taking those and letting someone else meet those because then I become bonded to that person. |
| 1:17.6 | And then I'm letting someone meet needs and I'm supposed to let Nancy meet those kind of things. |
| 1:21.6 | And so I think, yeah, I think in our culture we're very vulnerable to that because a lot of times |
| 1:25.2 | we don't meet each other's emotional needs. And I think our tendency in because a lot of times we don't meet each other's emotional needs and I think our tendency in culture a lot of times is to let someone else do that instead of |
| 1:31.6 | looking at your spouse and say these are some of my needs we have we need to figure this out we need |
| 1:36.1 | whatever we need to do we need to figure this out it's so easy to because there's always going to |
| 1:40.3 | be someone there private will listen they'll probably say some nice things. |
| 1:44.6 | They're not living with you. They don't know you. They know what they're on one side of the story, |
| 1:48.7 | your side of the story. And you do that and they make you feel good and you kind of begin |
... |
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