Embarrassed To Leave, Embarrassed To Stay: The Truth About The Trauma Bond!
The Mental Healness Podcast
Lee Hammock
4.9 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 29 May 2026
⏱️ 81 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
What happens when your childhood is marked by extreme survival, only for you to unconsciously recreate that exact nightmare in your adult marriage? In this profoundly raw and unfiltered episode, author, creator, and survivor Grace Sandra joins Lee Hammock to unpack the terrifying reality of severe trauma bonds, narcissistic abuse, and ultimate resilience.
Grace bravely opens up about surviving a childhood Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) score of 10, her ex-husband's chilling "simulation theory" threats, and the bizarre moment he claimed he wasn't a narcissist, just "strictly evil." This conversation is a masterclass in cognitive dissonance, understanding why trauma bonds are physically addictive, and how to finally reclaim your identity on the other side of darkness.
Connect with Grace Sandra:
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/outheretrynasurvive/🌐 Website & Resources: https://stan.store/GraceSandra📚 Check out her book on Amazon: Grace Actually: Memoirs and Musings on Faith, Love, Loss and Black Womanhood
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Right, home from work, walk the dog, kids are back. |
| 0:04.4 | Mom! |
| 0:05.0 | Up the stairs for something. |
| 0:07.8 | Ugh, back down, no idea what I went up for. |
| 0:12.0 | Mom, what's for dinner? |
| 0:13.6 | Chop, sizzle, done. |
| 0:17.1 | Hello, fresh, can't slow life down, but it makes bringing everyone together around the table a whole lot easier. |
| 0:23.4 | So its phones down, forks up. |
| 0:25.5 | Hello, Fresh. Bring back dinner time. |
| 0:29.8 | That's true, because towards the end of our marriage, he started developing this worldview that we're all in a simulation. |
| 0:35.1 | Yeah, and he went heavy on that. |
| 0:36.8 | To the point that it was scary. To the point that it was scary. He was saying scary stuff. Yeah, and he went heavy on that. And to the point that it was |
| 0:37.6 | scary, to the point that it was scary. He was saying scary stuff. Like, if I just, like, |
| 0:42.4 | pushed you off a clip or something, like, would it really matter because we're all in a simulation? |
| 0:46.3 | It was starting, it was freaking me out. |
| 0:52.2 | What's going on, Ms. Grace? How are you doing today? |
| 0:54.1 | How are you doing? I am doing wonderful, wonderful. Grace? How are you doing today? How are you doing? |
| 0:55.4 | I am doing wonderful, wonderful. Thank you for being, joining us today. I'm very excited to speak with you and get the deeps, get this story and whatnot, what's going on. |
| 1:04.9 | Me too, me too. |
| 1:06.7 | Tell us a little bit about yourself. |
| 1:09.4 | Okay, so you want the background, you want what you want. Okay, so you want the background. |
| 1:11.6 | You want what you want. |
... |
Transcript will be available on the free plan in 21 days. Upgrade to see the full transcript now.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Lee Hammock, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Lee Hammock and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.