Live on tape from the Ed Sullivan Theater in New York City, it's Stephen Colbert!

There you go! Welcome! Welcome one and all in here, out there all around the world to the late show.

I'm your host, Stephen Colbert, and I just want to start off tonight with an early blooming bouquet of happy Fridays to one and all.

It is good to have you here because I know everyone in my audience and everyone on my staff are fully vaxed to the maxed.

Unfortunately, that's not the case everywhere. Last week, the Supreme Court struck down Biden's vaccine mandate for large businesses.

And shortly thereafter, Starbucks announced it is no longer requiring employees to get vaccinated or submit to weekly testing, which is huge because they have over 9,000 US coffee shops.

And that's just a two-block radius around the Ed Sullivan Theater. This drink our coffee.

This policy has a big impact on the American workforce because Starbucks employees 200,000 workers, and it seems like none of them are working on your order, even though you're pretty sure that lady who just got the cake pops came in after you.

Subeat egg bites. Where's my Subeat egg bites?

In a memo, Starbucks COO tried to have it both ways, explaining,

while the vaccine rule is now paused, I want to emphasize that we continue to believe strongly in the spirit and intent of the mandate,

because nothing says you believe in a rule like no longer having it.

It's like telling your landlord, listen, I want you to know that I believe in this building's no pet policy, even though I've adopted a bangle tiger.

She smells you! Run!

The COO also down, down, down.

CEO also emphasized that more than 90% of Starbucks workers in the United States had disclosed their vaccination status,

but notably, he wouldn't say what percent of those workers are not fully vaccinated. Yeah, not particularly comforting.

Hey, before we make love, I want you to know that I took an STD test and I know for certain whether or not I have one.

Now let me just dim the lights before you get a good look at what we're dealing with here.

You like Jackson Pollock? You big fan of Jackson Pollock are you?

We here at the Columbia Broadcasting Syndicate want you to know that the late show is not only safe.

It's 100% free five days a week. How do we do it?

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