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The Art Of Coaching

E313 | How to Communicate with Someone Who Shuts Down or Stonewalls

The Art Of Coaching

Brett Bartholomew

Health & Fitness, Business, Education

5642 Ratings

🗓️ 12 February 2024

⏱️ 56 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Have you ever been in a tough conversation with someone who just withdrew or shut down?   Relationships and communication are a lot like an iceberg.  There’s often more going on beneath the surface that we can’t see or prepare ourselves for, eventually leading to an unexpected and harmful crash.   Today’s episode will improve your knowledge and understanding of why people shut down AND give you tools to navigate the crash.  Tune in for: What stonewalling is and key behaviors to look out for What we can do as leaders to get out of our own way Tips to think outside of the box for unexplored strategies for progress Pros and cons to common advice or relationship hacks Referenced Resources: We are fully aware of our scope of practice and this podcast is discussing general communication strategies around stonewalling and shutting down.  If you are in an abusive relationship we urge you to reach out to the National Domestic Violence Hotline by phone at 1-800-799-SAFE or online at thehotline.org. If you are listening outside of the US, seek local resources for support. We often use case studies generated from listener emails, as well as real life scenarios we’ve dealt with through our mentoring program.  If you’d like 1-on-1 guidance from our team, reach out to us today at [email protected] and let us know you’re interested in our mentoring program.  We will let you know what the next steps are from there! If you are dealing with similar situations like the ones discussed in today’s episode, get guidance, practice, feedback, and PRACTICAL SOLUTIONS at The Apprenticeship.  Our next workshop is in beautiful Phoenix, AZ, and the early bird special is only available for 9 more days!  Don’t miss out on your chance to SAVE $150!  Keep an eye on all of our Live Workshops for updates on our 2024 schedule! Referenced Material: 4 Communication Styles Podcast

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, quick personal note here.

0:01.1

So I'd appreciate if you tune into this.

0:03.0

And maybe I shouldn't share this, but I'd really like to.

0:05.9

Despite running a company that is largely focused

0:08.6

on communication and understanding power dynamics

0:12.9

and human interaction, I've all short a lot.

0:15.5

My wife and I have been together for 13 plus years.

0:18.2

We get an arguments.

0:19.4

We fight.

0:20.2

I lose my cool sometimes in many areas of my life.

0:23.9

And for a long time, I felt like that made me a failure.

0:26.9

And then what I realize is, it's exactly what we talk about

0:29.9

at Art of Coaching and Why Our Products Exist.

0:32.3

None of us are ever going to be good enough at communication.

0:35.8

My doctorate doesn't mean that I'm going to be a perfect communicator,

0:38.5

the fact that I write books on this doesn't mean

0:40.2

that I'm going to be a perfect communicator. And if you already feel like you're good enough in your professional life, well,

0:45.6

then I just ask you to consider

0:46.8

if you're where you want to be in your personal life.

0:49.3

Do you interact with your spouse or your partner

0:51.6

or your significant other the way that you want to?

0:53.9

Do you always show up for your kids the way that you want to?

...

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