DUPES OF HAZZARD

CALL CHELSEA PERETTI

Chelsea Peretti

Comedy, Society & Culture, Arts

4.7 • 1.5K Ratings

🗓️ 22 August 2025

⏱️ 63 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Callers call from parking lots and a man shares his journey away from Conservatism. Singing about condiments. Boomer parents. Emotional regulation. A loner surfer indulges a convo about riptides and risotto. Chelsea's triceps are beginning to show minor definition and her eyeliner is far from perfect, which you can see on Patreon.

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi.
0:01.5	Hello.
0:03.3	Good morning.
0:04.5	Good morning.
0:09.4	I'm in a Whole Foods parking lot right now.
0:14.6	Okay.
0:15.1	Sitting in the car.
0:16.6	You really thought you did something.
0:23.3	You were almost breathless to tell me this piece of absolute dribble.
0:30.0	I mean, instead of just feeling, oh, my God, oh, my God, I got through, I got through.
0:33.8	I'm just, oh, my God, I'm in a whole fit's barking lot.
0:38.9	The new variation. Oh, my God, oh, my God, I'm in a whole food's parking lot. The new variation.
0:43.5	Oh my God, oh my God. I'm in a whole food's parking lot. I'm like, is there a tornado? I'm in a whole food's parking lot. Healthy needs to know. Is there, I guess, a weather event wouldn't
0:50.4	be funny at this time. No, I'm waiting for my parents because I just moved back in with them and I'm on my way
1:00.7	to work with them so I can go apply the jobs around their work.
1:09.3	I really thought I got hung up on
1:14.9	I was just searching for my laugh button
1:17.7	Do you have any tips for like going in somewhere and just like bringing your resume?
1:25.8	Put it in a sat
1:27.1	Yeah Put it in a satchel!
1:29.6	Yeah.
1:30.4	Put it in one of those...
	...

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