Dr. Nicole LePera - Undoing Trauma Bonds And Getting Your Needs Met

ManTalks Podcast

Connor Beaton

Education, Self-improvement, Health & Fitness, Relationships, Society & Culture, Mental Health

4.8 • 591 Ratings

🗓️ 18 December 2023

⏱️ 74 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Talking points: grief, trauma, needs, resentment, relationships Dr. Nicole is one of the rare three-peats on my podcast, and she always delivers! Fresh off the tour for her new book, we dove straight into the heavy stuff. This is a great episode to listen to if you're wanting to take a closer look at relationship issues, modern dating troubles, and navigating all the emotions those bring. (00:00:00) - Intro, the book tour, and navigating grief and joy at the same time(00:08:10) - Why we isolate ourselves when we actually need community(00:15:47) - What do you feel has shifted in modern-day relationships?(00:23:12) - What does it mean to “be the love that you seek”?(00:28:05) - So how do our early relationships inform our present-day ones?(00:32:18) - Our earliest attachments did more than condition our behavior(00:38:17) - How early unmet emotional needs impact our present relationships, and how we identify them(00:44:32) - What do you say to men who claim they shouldn’t have emotional needs?(00:50:28) - What do when resentment creeps into a relationship, and why it’s so important to listen to the wisdom of the body(00:56:53) - Nicole’s take on how to regulate your nervous system(01:03:46) - What is a trauma bond, and how do you know you’re in one? Dr. Nicole LePera was trained in clinical psychology at Cornell University and the New School for Social Research. She also studied at the Philadelphia School of Psychoanalysis. As a clinical psychologist in private practice, Dr. Nicole LePera often found herself frustrated by the limitations of traditional psychotherapy. Wanting more for her patients—and for herself—she began a journey to develop a united philosophy of mental, physical, and spiritual health that equips people with the tools necessary to heal themselves. Nothing short of a paradigm shift, Dr. Nicole LePera’s teachings empower the individual to break free from trauma cycles and create who they want to become. Connect with Dr. Nicole: -Website: https://yourholisticpsychologist.com/ -Instagram: @the.holistic.psychologist -Youtube: https://bit.ly/3fmD5eH -New book: How To Be The Love You Seek: https://howtobetheloveyouseek.com/ -TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@theholisticpsychologist/ Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/ Check out some free resources: How To Quit Porn | Anger Meditation | How To Lead In Your Relationship Build brotherhood with a powerful group of like-minded men from around the world. Check out The Alliance. Enjoy the podcast? If so, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, or Podchaser. It helps us get into the ears of new listeners, expand the ManTalks Community, and help others find the tools and training they’re looking for. And don't forget to subscribe on Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | Spotify For more episodes, visit us at ManTalks.com | Facebook | Instagram | Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	All right, Dr. Nicole, welcome back to the Man Talk Show. How are you doing?
0:08.1	I'm incredible. Thank you again, as always, for having me, Connor.
0:11.0	You got it. You got it. Three Pete. We got a three Pete in the house.
0:15.1	Yes, wild. I always love our conversations. I feel like you and I have a very good dialogue to the point where you're one of
0:23.3	the few guests that I've actually gone back and listened to, which is really interesting.
0:28.0	Mostly because I have that thing that I think a lot of people do, which is I get self-conscious listening
0:35.2	to myself. Like the TED talk that I did years ago, I'm like, oh, I can't watch that. And mostly because I would change probably what I talked about in the TED talk, but you're one of the guests that I've actually really loved and be like, oh, wait, what did she say? And what did we talk? Like, I want to go back and hear that. So I'm really looking forward to this conversation. All that said, how have you been?
0:56.4	How has the book tour been going? This is, you know, it's already been a massive success.
1:01.8	How has it been going? And what's it like for you to go through the whirlwind of this cycle again?
1:07.4	Well, thank you. I'm honored to be someone that you're willing to listen to yourself. I have that
1:11.9	exact same thing in terms of not wanting to hear my voice, not wanting to overanalyze my performance,
1:16.9	wanting to critique it. So thank you for sharing that. How I've been is, it's really been a whirlwind,
1:23.7	especially the past couple weeks for me. The book in general, the topic of the book
1:28.6	in general on relationships is something that for me has been really always top of mind,
1:36.1	having struggled for so long within my relationships, having been a couples counselor. So creating
1:42.0	this book and thinking conceptually about it and writing as much of my own
1:46.4	journey into it has, of course, I think is always the case just brought up a lot emotionally
1:52.4	kind of revisiting. And especially this past week where I had the opportunity as I was sharing
1:57.9	with you beforehand to this was the first book of the three, the first one having come out during COVID where I had the opportunity as I was sharing with you beforehand to this was the first book of the three,
2:01.9	the first one having come out during COVID where I had the opportunity to even think about
2:06.2	or consider a book tour in-person events. And while one of the stops that we had made and
2:14.0	decided on was New York City, which is where I spent almost the entirety of my 20s, which was really cool. And then that gave my family the opportunity to attend. I did a stop
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Connor Beaton, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of Connor Beaton and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.