Dr. Ethan's Dating Cinematic Universe

Bropostles

Ethan and Patrick

Religion & Spirituality, Relationships, Christianity, Society & Culture

4.7 • 531 Ratings

🗓️ 1 May 2022

⏱️ 82 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A classic Crunch episode. One of my favourites in years! - Unpaid Summer Intern Reagan, JD.

In this episode:

Patrick demands fan art, Ethan would rather do it himself
faking a mars-canadian girlfriend without the internet
Who impregnated Bill Gates mom? The answer may suprise you.
what ethan would do if he owned twitter
devastating results of the crunch summer survey
ethan feels powerful in a henley shirt
"emma, get my buncomb!"
ducktective noir
JC Penny Goose Sentinels
eating stuffed olives to give your baby a friend
gifted kid syndrome and media addiction
The JJ Reddick Article: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/03/21/sports/jj-redick-sixers.html
did Jesus have a routine?
becoming scandalized by our own inability to follow our self-imposed rules of life
the problem with the pharisees. You do have to give it to em.
we must live excelently, as the saints did.
The right response to continually failing at a routine
Ethan hates writing articles, but wants to be a writer
the little-known wife of Mark Twain
the best gift you can give your future spouse?
one-legged skiing. Ethan demands how.
Ethan attempts to set up a terrible joke three times.
the last DEDC for awhile? Not if you submit your dating woes, faithful listener. Go to bit.ly/crunchdiscord > dating-corner to find the link.
Ethan tries to convince Patrick to name his son Patrick Neve the IVth. Patrick names him Leo anyway.

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	Guess what I'm drinking?
0:01.9	Patslerimen. Nope. Oh. This is a Budweiser heavy. Okay. Budweiser heavy. Gotta get that diesel. It's a normal Budweiser. It's called a Budweiser heavy. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, it's just delicious. This is all we had in the fridge. Oh, is it skunky? It's not skunky. It's been, I mean...
0:23.3	It just tastes like Budweiser, which is... Oh, I mean, I've never had a problem with it. Yeah, it's a... I mean, it's a logger, you know, hard to complain. Are you ready to begin the show?
0:40.1	I'm ready to begin the crunch podcast.
0:41.8	The crunch podch cat? Okay.
0:42.9	The crud podch cat.
1:00.8	This Budweiser is heavy. Welcome to The Crunch.
1:04.3	The Only Podcasts that's a little worried about starting to do lunges.
1:05.3	It's your boy, Ethan.
1:06.3	And I'm Patrick.
1:08.6	I thought you were going to say, welcome to The Crunch,
1:12.6	the only podcast that thinks we should all take this coronavirus thing a little more serious.
1:13.2	I don't know.
1:15.1	This seems like it's going to be a big thing. I don't know. You guys heard of this yet? Yeah, I was hoping you'd ask me. It was a two-partners hoping you'd ask me about what I said. Instead, you made your own joke. I'm sorry. Let's go back to your lunges.
1:25.4	Let's just go right back.
1:27.4	Why did you make that joke?
1:29.1	Well, it just would be a big step forward.
1:30.7	See, usually... let's go back to your lunges let's just go back right back what why why did you make that joke well
1:29.2	it just would be a big step forward see usually usually how yeah come on you got you got you got to let me
1:38.0	tell my joke instead of just stomping over me like some kind of comedy troll so the the thing is no here's the thing when I pitched when
1:45.2	I pitched that bit to you where you say welcome to the crunch the only podcast that blank that was
1:49.8	supposed to be the joke not the setup for a punchline but this time it's different like sometimes
	...

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