I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing.

I know now what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent.

I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired.

Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.

Welcome to Dear Old Dads, the podcast that's bracing for the worst. I'm Tom Curry. I'm joined as always.

Jesus Christ. By Thomas Smith and Eli Bosnick. Hello, gentlemen. You try writing something given this topic. That was a hate crime.

I'll be suing Tom. You know, the structure of the intro does not lend itself well to serious topics. I just want to say. I understand it. Look, Thomas is just mad. Tom, you have to understand Thomas is just mad because he's not a dad anymore. He's not a man. And he's not actually human because we've sadly had to announce Thomas has stopped mowing his own lawn. And that's what makes you a dad. That's what makes you a dad. That's it. Do you still have the crocs, though?

Tell me you still have crocs.

Oh, I still have the crocs.

I still have the crocs.

Okay.

You'll be pleased to know. So I let the boys in on my personal shame that I finally have realized that I'm not, in fact, ever going to get to it. That's not going to happen. even though I say I'm going to get to it, whatever it is, it doesn't matter what it is, I'm going to get to it. There always be a time when I'm not as busy. And when it comes to the yard, it became like a jungle out there. Like it's really, like it gives like Tom's house growing up vibes, you know, like Tom's mom could live out there. The snapping turtle drops spine, he's like, I know a co-worker of yours, and you're like, oh, I love you, man.

And I finally told Lydia, I was like, just hire people. I can't do it. It sucks. I actually, I enjoy yard work. I've got so many fun tools that I do yard work with over the years. It's fun. And not only did I have the crocs, I upgraded to thick ass rubber boots so that I was just just out there weed eating, you know, just to fucking having a good time. I just never have time anymore. And it sucks because the kids have been wanting to actually, they've been wanting to practice baseball with me out there. And I'm like, oh, we can't because it's certain death. If the ball hits the ground, you'll never see it again. You never see it of the snakes. I mean, Arlo, Arlo just get eaten by fucking tigers or whatever. Yeah, exactly. He is leopard meat. And I'm not afraid to say that about other people's kids. How edible they are by leopards. And so, yeah, we're just going to. So Thomas is retiring from the show. Or we're going to rename it. We've considered renaming it dear old dads and also Thomas, who needs other men to come and clear the brush from his property.

His land is there, then.

Yeah, I'm not a manly man like Eli anymore.

I'm not out there.

It's not about manhood, Thomas.

It's about personhood.

It's about humanity. You stopped voting, right? We talked about this. You're not allowed to vote in any more elections. That's super important to me. Yeah. I spent all the years of my first two, three houses mowing and now, no. Like at this house, no, never. I i'll never i don't want to own a lawnmower

i don't want to own a weed whacker or a hedge trimmer i don't want to do any i discovered that i

fucking hate that kind of work so kudos to you for not like loathing it i don't understand that

at all i think it's misery that's a thing from my upbringing that I have a hard time.

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