I'm the cool dad. That's, that's my thing.

I know now what I can offer you that no one else can. Complete and undependent.

I'm a man. I'm sensitive. I need to feel loved. I need to be desired.

Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy.

Welcome to dear old dads, the podcast that's going to commit a murder.

Oh, wow.

Tom Curry, I'm joined as always by Thomas Smith and Eli Bosnick.

That's right, Tom. That's right. I am going to commit a murder. A little bit of a, a little bit of a tangent for the podcast. I know you've been coming here for humorous dad content. Well, not anymore. We're a true crime podcast. Who did it? Me. I did the murder that you're learning about in the future

because I'm going to commit a murder most foul. Listen to this story I have to tell you.

Also, I'm here. Hi, but fuck me, I guess. I don't know. No, I do want to hear that.

Thomas, are you going to commit a murder in the next couple of hours? You know what? Probably not before yours. So you go ahead. Oh, wait. You've got a time limit on it? We got to do it in the next couple of hours? Because I just thought this is like in general. In priority for the story, he's saying. So like next, it's a next murder kind of wins rule. All right. I just don't want to get out of the, I don't want to be taken out of the running. Murder, she dibs. Yeah, I take a number. So I was on vacation this past weekend as listeners to God Awful Movies. Well, no, I was not all the last God Awful Movies because I was on vacation. Every year, me and my closest friends go to a magic convention.

That's right, the Magi Fest, if you will, in Columbus, Ohio, beautiful Columbus, Ohio,

City to the Stars. And while I was gone, I parked my vehicle around the corner of my house

in front of my neighbor's house. Now, something that I did not

realize is that my city has a law that if someone calls and reports your car as abandoned,

if you do not move it within 48 hours, they tow your car.

Excuse me, what?

So you could just prank everybody's car if they don't move within 48 hours.

Yeah, wow.

So I parked my car in front of my neighbor's house last Wednesday, and when I got back on Sunday, however many days later, that is, my car had been towed.

My car was towed 72 hours.

I mean, I was parked in front of my neighbor's house for one day before they reported it as

...