Hi, you're listening to Small Things Often from the Gottman Institute, where we talk you through

research-based tips to help improve your relationships in five minutes or less.

Today's tip is about making time for a date with your partner. When was the last time you

really connected to your partner?

We mean really, not just discussing the state of your phone bill or falling asleep watching TV.

Really connecting.

Because for a relationship to thrive, you've got to continuously learn who your partner is,

show them that you know who they are, and tell them often why you like and appreciate them.

And what better way to do that than on a date?

But yeah, we hear you.

You're busy.

Work, family commitments, chores, and errands.

And if you can't find time to even make a dentist appointment, how are you going

to find time to connect with your partner? Well, we're here to tell you that it can be done.

It just takes a little creativity. Only got 10 minutes to spare? How about planning a micro date

once a week? This is a time for you and your partner to spend 10 minutes of uninterrupted time together to strengthen your connection.

This could take many forms.

Maybe take a walk around the neighborhood, or do a back rub swap, or maybe just hold hands and put on some music.

The point is to spend the time turning towards

each other and expressing your fondness and admiration. Be curious. Ask questions. Tell them what

you appreciate about them. Got an hour? Fill it with something that you both like to do.

Maybe cook that pasta recipe you've been talking about for a month,

...