Do Our Friendships Have to Be This Complicated?

What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood

Kids & Family, Comedy, Parenting

4.8 • 1K Ratings

🗓️ 17 September 2025

⏱️ 40 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Have female friendships become more complicated than they need to be? Amy and Margaret dig into the dynamics of their own female-female friendships and what the research says: why some friendships last decades, why others drift apart, and why friendship “breakup texts” have become a thing. In this episode you'll learn: Why women expect more intimacy and reciprocity from friends than men do Why conflict styles play a big role in how friendships evolve The six categories of friendship that women and men look for, but with different priorities How to reconnect with old friends (without the awkwardness) Why it’s okay for different friends to meet different needs Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in this episode: Olga Khazan for The Atlantic: Why Do We Break Up With Friends? Emine Saner for The Guardian: Drifting away from your friends? Here are 10 questions to bring you closer Heather Havrilesky for The Cut: Why Do My Friendships Always Fade Away? Lilly Dancyger for Elle Magazine: We Need to Talk About Our Ex-Best Friends Fresh Take: Kat Vellos On Friendship and Connection Leigh E. Elkin and Christopher Peterson for Sex Roles Journal: Gender Differences in Best Friendships Dr. Jeffrey Hall et. al for The Journal of Personal and Social Relationships: Friendship standards: The dimensions of ideal expectations Michelle Ellman: BAD FRIEND Fresh Take: Norah Lally We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at ⁠www.monarchmoney.com/FRESH female friendships, friendship breakups, adult friendships, friendship drama, friendship conflict, why friendships end, complicated friendships, friendship boundaries, friendship vs marriage, friendship stereotypes, friendship expectations, male vs female friendships, how to reconnect with friends, friendship advice for moms, low-conflict friendships, friendship categories research, Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0	It's you. Hi. You're the problem. It's you.
0:05.6	What fresh hell. Laughing in the face of motherhood.
0:09.5	It's the Amy's Problem podcast that you just, you know, listen to every week.
0:14.0	With Margaret Abels and Amy Wilson.
0:16.4	His friends are my friends too, John Jacob Jinkleheimer Schmidt.
0:20.5	A podcast that solves today's parenting dilemmas so you don't have to.
0:25.0	I like to bring a blanket to a fire and hide it underneath it.
0:31.3	Hello, everyone, and welcome to What Fresh Hell, laughing in the face of motherhood. This is Margaret.
0:36.3	And this is Amy. Today we're talking
0:38.2	about whether female friendships are more complicated than male friendships and why that is.
0:46.2	And is that a stereotype or is it true? Yes, and I know why. But okay, I'm ready. I'm ready to listen.
0:51.2	But here's my question for you as we start. Have you ever had a
0:55.9	friendship breakup? Olga Kazan wrote about this in the Atlantic. And she's like, this is a thing that
1:01.4	everybody deals with, the giant block of text from a female friend, a friendship performance review,
1:07.3	and they're listing all your slites and how you're not going to be able to be friends anymore,
1:11.1	friendship breakup. Have you ever had that happen to you? 100% no. I don't know what that. I don't even know
1:15.9	what it's referencing. Me neither. And yet as I researched this episode, there were tons of stories written
1:22.7	about how painful it is to go through a friendship breakup and how it's harder than a romantic
1:27.3	relationship. And I miss my bestie so much, but we had this terrible breakup. And I thought, when did this start happening? Is this a generational thing? What is this? No, I don't think it is. I know from Reddit that this happens all the time. I know a danger zone is people's weddings. People break up with their long-time friendship.
1:44.5	Like, weddings have become so crazy because you didn't come to my three-day bachelor.
1:48.9	You didn't come to the three-day thing or you weren't enthusiastic enough about my thing
1:52.7	or I wanted you to buy a dress that cost $800 and you got mad at me or whatever friendships.
	...

Please login to see the full transcript.

Previous episode | Next episode

Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.

Generated transcripts are the property of What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.