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OBC.

Four minutes after 12 is the time.

And my goodness me, we've said it before and we'll say it again.

But rarely have we said it with such sincerity.

I am ready for some light relief this hour. I really am, ready for some laughs.

And don't forget, this is the only hour of radio in the United Kingdom that comes with a guarantee of at least one laugh out loud moment before one o'clock today. And that's not the only guarantee that Mr. out comes with. It also comes with a guarantee that by one o'clock you will know more than you do

now. You may not thank me for the knowledge. You may not be able to put it to any constructive use.

You may not even be able to remember it by tea time. But at one o'clock today, you will definitely

know more than you do now. Phone lines are full already, but I suspect a couple of these may turn out to be chaff rather

than wheat, so keep dialing.

The number you need, there's two phone lines free now if you've got a question, 03456060973.

Okay, here we are.

Mistria is your weekly opportunity to achieve the sort of satisfaction,

...