The following talk was given at the Insight Meditation Center in Redwood City, California.

Please visit our website at adioderma.org.

Okay. Good to sit with you.

So I had a memory teaching a few days ago of a few times as a kid.

I remember, I don't know, 10, 8, 10, something like that.

And I remember kind of playing this weird thought experiment game

in my mind.

And it would go something like I would just,

and I don't know where this is from,

and maybe this is, I needed some help or something, but I felt okay emotionally,

but I remember I would imagine things falling away.

And first that I was never born.

That was quite conceivable.

And then my brother and my parents, family, never existed.

OK, what about our species?

What about no history, no time, no universe?

Nothing.

Nothing.

And I would kind of hit this point of like real, abiding, nothingness, and then sort of freak out.

And I would freak out, you know, in retrospect, probably for a few reasons.

So first I was actively imagining my death and the changingness of all things.

And that's a lot, you know, for a kid.

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