Hi, this is Janet Lansfrey. Welcome to Unruffold. Well, today I'm going to be sharing an

interaction I had with a parent online in a message on one of my social media pages. She's

concerned about her son who's four years old, who's being demanding, aggressive, erratic. This behavior's volatile.

And like so many parents that reach out to me, and I saw this with my own children, actually,

she tells me at one point that her little boy has been such a gentle, thoughtful boy up until recently. And of course, right there

is where we're seeing our actual child. That's our child when they're feeling emotionally regulated,

comfortable, okay in their skin. They're feeling safe where they are and in who they are. So no matter what your

child is going through, what their behavior is looking like, know that there is that vulnerable

person behind there that we want to help bring out again, obviously.

So here's the parents' note.

Hi, I would love to take the time to compose a more polished message, but I'm going to try to be very quick.

I love your podcast and books, and it has all helped my family so much.

My husband and I have an almost seven-year-old daughter,

four-year-old son, and a new baby girl age four months. Our son has been having a hard time for over a

year now with aggressive behavior towards his older sister, when frustrated about her or himself

or a transition, etc. And also being extremely demanding of my time,

often to help him with projects and creations that he imagines, but doesn't quite have the ability

to create on his own or gather the materials for on his own. He will wake up and decide to build

a cardboard robot and need help from the moment I open my eyes.

But I need to put my contacts in, feed the baby, etc.

And he doesn't want my husband's help.

And our daughter will try to help, but often they get frustrated with each other.

...