Welcome to Kelly Corrigan Wonders.

I'm Kelly Corrigan, and today I'm wondering about the stories we tell ourselves and how they might limit us.

My guest is Courtney Smith, an enneagram coach and consultant, who wrote the workbook,

Choosing Wholeness Over Goodness, with Elise Lonen.

After graduating from Yale Law School, Courtney spent over a decade as a corporate consultant

before taking time off to raise her children, and that's when she started questioning the assumptions

and patterns she was bringing to her

life choices. Courtney and Elise used the seven deadly sins as a framework to examine cultural

expectations for women. Today, we talk about why women struggle to say no, why envy might be

telling you something important about what you really want and the drama

triangle that keeps us stuck. We'll dive into why taking responsibility feels both terrifying and

liberating and we'll look at the ways we often accept substitutes for what we actually need.

Here's my conversation with Courtney Smith.

So, actually need. Here's my conversation with Courtney Smith. So I wanted to talk to you because we're about to embark on this series for March, which is Women's History Month, where we think about

the ways that women can and cannot comfortably operate in the world.

And a lot of the limitations that we might be feeling could be self-imposed.

That's really what I was taking out of the book that you and Elise Lonen wrote together,

choosing wholeness over goodness.

So can we talk first about the difference between

fixed mindset and growth mindset and then map that onto this idea of stories and the way they

either set us free or limit us. Okay, great. I'm so excited to talk about all this.

The first thing that I would say, and no one's ever asked me about the book in the context of

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