Welcome to Decoding the Big Book, a special limited series of the Sober Friends podcast.

Researched and sourced from writing the big book by William Sheaberg,

the purpose of each episode is to provide context and history for each chapter of the Big

Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, followed by a

reading of the chapter from the fourth edition. Each section is marked by chapters, so feel

free to skip ahead to what you're interested in and leave the rest. Two Wives, a chapter in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is a product of its time

and reflects the prejudices and preconceptions of women that were prevalent in 1938.

At the time, the word alcoholic was considered to refer only to men by

Bill's emerging fellowship. Women had won the right to vote only 18 years earlier and were

still considered subservient to men in every area of a couple's life. Dr. Bob Smith, a significant figure in AA, held the view that women

had no place in AA. He believed that AA's principles could not work for women and that it was

difficult for a female alcoholic to get sober. Dr. Bob often delegated the handling of female

alcoholics to his wife and to the wives of other alcoholics.

Bill Wilson, the author of the big book, wrote the chapter to wives himself, despite urban myths that he asked Anne Smith or Lois Wilson to write it.

Lois wanted to write the chapter, feeling that she was more qualified to discuss

how women should support their husbands through their recovery. However, Bill refused her offer,

as he wanted to maintain the same writing style throughout the book and was concerned that

a non-alcoholic would not be able to write accurately about the alcoholic condition.

Bill's focus on getting the new man sober and his awareness of the fragility of this new recovery are evident in two wives.

He aimed to convey to a middle-aged man, typically in late-stage alcoholism,

that the spouse of a newly sober man had to treat him with kid gloves at first

to buy him some emotional stability.

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