Debunking Attachment Myths #2
Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.6 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 3 November 2025
⏱️ 93 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.
00:00 Dr. Pascal Vrticka
01:04 Are dads 'secondary moms'?
02:13 Is the Triune Brain Model a good explanation of attachment?
09:13 Is synchrony better for attachment?
29:53 Is Oxytocin just the love hormone?
36:31 Is Polyvagal Theory supported by current literature?
45:31 Are there parenting hacks that work for everybody?
49:41 Is there really a left and right brain?
50:51 Does attachment involve more than just fear and stress?
52:38 Why is parent-child bonding important to say?
53:13 Do parents always need to be 'on'?
54:03 Is attachment parenting based on attachment theory?
1:10:55 Should parents let their babies cry it out?
1:15:25 Do we inherit our attachment style?
1:26:24 Are Buddhism and attachment theory related?
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November 3, 2025
The Psychology In Seattle Podcast ®
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, |
| 0:00.2 | Jordan listeners, this is part two in which I read some myths in attachment and react to |
| 0:07.6 | them. |
| 0:08.1 | My name is Dr. Kirkana. |
| 0:09.6 | I'm a therapist and a professor. |
| 0:11.3 | The page that I'm reading from is Dr. Pascal Vertica's page, |
| 0:16.2 | Associate Professor in Psychology at the University of Essex, United Kingdom. |
| 0:20.5 | Dr. Pascal Vertica, |
| 0:22.5 | his last name is spelled V-R-T-I-C-K-A. His website is P-F-R-T-I-C-A. |
| 0:30.5 | And V-R-T-I-C-A.com. And I'm looking at the attachment myth-busting page. |
| 0:38.8 | So let's continue with the myths. |
| 0:41.7 | And I'll remind everyone, like in the first part of this series of episodes, I'll remind |
| 0:47.2 | everyone that I will probably be rambling to some extent. |
| 0:50.9 | So if you're not interested in a somewhat disorganized episode, I wouldn't listen to this. |
| 0:55.9 | The last episode definitely had rambly bits. So if that frustrates you, maybe skip this one. |
| 1:04.0 | All right. This next myth that is being debunked by the following statement, which is, |
| 1:09.4 | dads are neither substitute moms nor |
| 1:11.6 | secondary attachment figures. Yeah. So absolutely agree. And I appreciate this one being |
| 1:18.3 | in number three in that a lot of people culturally and sometimes in the clinical world will |
| 1:24.6 | think of moms as the primary parent and that the dads are secondary or |
| 1:30.4 | they're there to help or their secondary attachment figures or you'll have cultural or even |
| 1:36.8 | religious understandings that fathers could never replace a mother that men don't have the same |
... |
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