Cyclops Breasts And Exploding Testicles

Distorted View Daily

Tim Henson

Comedy Fiction, Improv, Fiction, Comedy

4.8 • 1.1K Ratings

🗓️ 6 February 2023

⏱️ 46 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

On Today’s Show: Introduction 0:00.000 976-INNARDS 1:59.295 Casting 900 Phone Sex Commercials 4:45.184 Angry Voicemails From Phone Sex Customers 8:13.648 Turns Out Emma Watson is Not A Good Person 12:28.091 Woman With A Cycloptic Boob And Big Fat V 15:29.935 Finding The Person Who Stole Your Credit Card 20:07.701 Make Timmyboo Smile – Sign Up For The Sideshow 22:32.605 I’m Working On a Galileo Game 24:05.868 Deciphering Old People’s Loofah Sex Codes 26:46.991 Exploding Testicle Leads To Endorsement Deal 33:13.149 […]

Transcript

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0:00.0	Frank's It's Monday, February 6, 2023 coming up on the program today.
0:04.9	We listen to angry voicemails from customers of phone sex lines.
0:08.5	Plus, a cycloptic-titted woman, a testicle explosion leads to a sponsorship deal, and Sean
0:14.5	Hannity is dick-obsessed, Emma Watson's a Nazi, and my MacBook Pro is a homophobe.
0:22.7	Distorted view daily.
0:24.6	Howardly presents a song about worms having sex.
0:54.6	Making worms, it's mating time, I said words, exchanging sperm, locked together with slime.
1:04.6	The cocoon slips off the front of the worm, filled with fluid eggs and sperm.
1:11.0	Then the eggs are fertilized, and the cocoon has little worms inside a worm.
1:18.6	Making worms, it's mating time, I said words, exchanging sperm, locked together with slime.
1:28.6	I said words, it's mating time, I said words, exchanging sperm, locked together with slime.
1:41.6	Distorted view show with Tim Hanson.
1:44.6	I'm a sucker for other people's pain.
1:46.6	I'm not going to die because I'm a careless fairy.
1:48.6	Why does man have to have such a sweet wrap?
1:51.6	I love the app case of semen in my mouth.
1:53.6	Crystal Matthews is up your plate hoe.
1:55.6	The vagina is full of eggs.
1:58.6	Yes, Tim Hanson, back here with you to kick off a new week of programs.
2:03.6	Thank you so much for joining me today.
2:06.6	As always, have a banger of an episode.
2:09.6	We begin with a submission from a listener in our Discord Dave's oil painting submitted a very 1990s phone sex commercial.
	...

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