Welcome back to the Look and Sound of Leadership, an ongoing series of executive

coaching tips designed to help you be perceived in the workplace the way you

want to be perceived. I'm Tom Henschel, your executive coach, and today

we're talking about combating emotional hijacks. Kimberly lowered her eyes and spoke quietly. She said, I didn't like myself very much at that

point. I said nothing. She went on. The minute I got back to my office I knew I shouldn't have said what I said. I can't believe I thought even for a minute that Max didn't have my best interest at heart. Of course he did. He always does.

She shook her head slowly and blew out a big breath. I stayed silent. She was coaching

herself more effectively than I ever could.

She looked me right in the eyes and said,

That feeling, watching hurtful words come out of my mouth and not being able to stop them,

I hate that. It's like my brain short circuits.

It does, I said. It gets taken over, it gets hijacked.

She gave a surprised bark of a laugh.

Huh, that's a good word.

It feels like a hijacking.

I'm standing there, watching myself do something I wish I weren't doing and I'm helpless to stop it.

I said, you know you're not alone, right, Kimberly?

When something triggers fight or flight or freeze, we all say and do things that are pure reaction, no thought.

It's called an Amigdala hijack.

Oh, I've heard of the Amigola, she said.

That's the lizard part of the brain, right?

Actually, the lizard brain is the brain's stem.

That's an even older part of the brain than the amygdala.

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