I'm Claire Parker and I'm Ashley Hamilton and this is Celebrity Memoir Book Club.

We add a little bit of our own opinion to the meat of a celebrity memoir and if you don't like what we have to add you can punch me in my fucking face.

Another thing is sometimes we're reading words that we've never seen before and so we'll get them wrong and if you feel that deeply upset by the mispronunciation of a word I would say get out now.

Your fragile little brain isn't going to be able to handle our hot hot critiques and our tiny little mistakes and I hope that you treat the people in your real life with a little bit more kindness and compassion than you treat us

because sometimes people have never heard a word out loud and they say it wrong.

We're trying the best we can and sometimes when we are trying to put out content every single week we don't have time to Google every single word that's on the page.

It's a lot more time consuming than you think it would be that being said we are taking a week off and this is your notice I am so sorry but we are taking a little vacation the week of May 29th.

So mark your calendars there won't be a new episode but there will be a new patreon episode where we will be discussing the shift by tanks.

Wait so we get a week off but we still have to read a book. I guess I didn't realize that we were making the schedule okay a book a week until we die baby.

Um do I know some other news?

Yeah please tell me anything you can think of.

We've got new merch.

Oh my god you guys I have never been more sect for merch my life this is like the merch that I live and died for.

It is ugliest girl in the world attack merch for all of the girls up there who've sometimes had an attack where they go and my the ugliest girl in the world.

If you feel attacked by the potential that you made the ugliest girl in the world all we can do is prescribe a comfy cozy hoodie that you cocoon up in until you remember that you are in fact lovely.

Yeah I mean there's eight billion people out there the chances that it's you are so slim you haven't seen every girl in the world.

But sometimes it is you and you've got to get it.

Sometimes you look at the mirror and you go unfortunately I have done my due diligence I've seen what needed to be seen and it is me I am the ugliest girl in the world believe it or not.

Plus we've got matching shorts and overall the vibe is something I'm excited to share.

I'm so excited I'm never more excited for anything our lives Adrian Perrell's designed it at Hello Adrian.

It's also a limited edition run so in order to get it to you guys as quickly as possible we are pre printing an amount so if you're interested I recommend signing up as quickly as possible because when they run out we're out.

Speaking of other things that come in a limited amount there are only so many seats in the cities that we are visiting we will be in Toronto at Lanna Nashville.

...