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LOVERS by Shan

Celibutt...Good Lord It's Hard Ft Stephan Speaks

LOVERS by Shan

Lemonada Media

Relationships, Society & Culture, Sexuality, Health & Fitness

5.05.7K Ratings

🗓️ 1 February 2023

⏱️ 45 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Celibacy, abstinence, sex strike, sexlessness, dry spell ….call it what you may but we can all agree is challenging. This week we are joined by Stephan Speaks- one of the most popular voices in the relationship education space. Stephan has devoted himself to a life of celibacy on more than one occasion: first run with the intention to connect with God, second to connect with his God-given purpose and now he finds himself conflicted between looking for the clarity that celibacy seemed to give him before and longing for the intimacy he desires as a healthy, single, eligible bachelor. Thanks to the sponsors of this episode. Dipsea!Whether you want to energize your sex life for yourself, a lover or so you can channel that energy elsewhere, try tuning into Dipsea because listeners of Lovers and Friends, get a 30 day free trial! Go to http://DipseaStories.com/LOVERSLinks to episode clips that were featured in this episode. Glo Atanmo:https://youtu.be/lbIaM09t0ZUTanarelle:https://youtu.be/FcKrnF2OpS4Rachel Lindsay: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnEORZJD2pQ&t=354sSex Strike: http://youtu.be/71ZgcVtMq84Follow Shan: http://instagram.com/shanboodyhttp://tiktok.com/shanboodyhttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCSE2Lr9RfYXiFtiX1jk5qngloversfriendspodcast@gmail.comFollow Stephan Speaks:http://instagram.com/stephanspeakshttps://www.stephanspeaks.com/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPBO9gLGy8ujsJ7xjARI7owSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

So walk me through your psyche right now of like celibacy.

0:04.0

For a long time, I wasn't even willing to say I'm off that train.

0:08.5

And even now, like even when you asked me earlier, I'm like, I'm conflicted.

0:11.7

I'm kind of in the middle.

0:13.0

So I'm never completely rejecting being abstinent.

0:18.5

I just know that right now it's a struggle like it's never been before.

0:22.5

So I think that's the huge difference between how I'm walking it out now and why it still

0:26.7

remains more of a conflict now compared to then. I was just like, I'm going to lock myself in this

0:30.6

room. I'm not going anywhere. That's it because I knew the minute I step outside, something might

0:36.5

happen. Lovers and friends. I'm gonna take you on a trip, baby, I don't pretend, I say,

0:44.3

lovers and friends, I'm gonna hold you down down to the end, I said.

0:49.3

Salivacy, abstinence, or as I recently discussed on a YouTube video on my main channel,

0:55.8

sex strikes.

0:57.1

Women, y'all grant access to sex.

0:59.8

So if you want to have a serious relationship, you're trying to build something with somebody

1:03.6

and you're not giving them sex, they can get it somewhere else.

1:07.2

Interestingly, as someone who talks about sex for a living,

1:09.8

I find myself talking about not having sex a whole lot too.

1:13.6

And even like right now, I'm currently in a season where I'm like, I really don't give a fuck about fucking.

1:19.6

Remember being in a space where I thought like I would never have sex again.

1:24.6

I think people would be really disappointed to hear currently about our sex life.

1:29.3

Becoming celibate was also my way of like taking out any confusion.

...

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