Hi, this is Jimmy Evans with Marriage Today.

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Research has proven that most of the dating that we do in choosing a spouse is a very, it's done on the subconscious.

And a good analogy is an iceberg.

You see an iceberg and the tip is sticking out of the water, but the mass is below the water.

When we're dating, we're looking at a person typically on a very superficial level.

But God is doing something so much more under the

surface that we don't even know about. And it's the not knowing that creates the danger.

It's not understanding what God is doing when we're choosing a spouse that really creates the

danger in when we marry and a lot of the pain that is caused in marriage.

So I want to talk about two sovereign and subconscious choices that we make when we're choosing a spouse.

When Karen and I were dating, I was dating her, I didn't know there was anything deeper than just

going out and having fun. But God

wires us to choose a spouse according to his will. God wires us to choose a spouse in a certain way.

And there's something way deeper going on when we're dating. And then the person we marry,

there's something much more sovereign that we think there is

in who we marry. And so there's two choices that we make when we're dating and get married

that we need to understand. The first is when we're dating and marry, we're trying to find a

person to be our compatible opposite. Now, a lot of people would say, no, when I marry, I'm looking for someone that's like me.

No, you're not. On a conscious level, you may think that you're looking for a person that's like you.

God wired you to find your opposite. This is what Genesis 218 says. The Lord said, it is not good

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