So being alone, it can be a great time to recharge, relax and just be, it can also feel

really lonely. Many of my clients have been asking me for some tips on how to really not

suffer with loneliness. You know, we all have different experiences of being alone.

Some of us feel terribly alone, even if we're in a crowded room. Some of us feel so alone

that we isolate. Others of us put on masks and pretend everything's okay. When inside

we feel separate and like no one understands us. Loneliness is dangerous because it perpetuates

the misunderstanding that we are separate. All of us were born knowing that we are connected

to God and each other, but then fear sets in and we forget. We start to feel separate

and like we're on our own. When you feel lonely having someone else there seems like

the solution. However, the solution really lies in reinterpreting your experience of

being alone and finding ways to connect both to yourself and to spirit. Now you may be

asking, how do I feel connected when I feel totally alone and disconnected? Sometimes

the experience of loneliness can feel so painful that connection seems almost impossible.

If that feels true for you, here's a four step process you can use to support yourself

in relieving feeling lonely. Step one, indulge. Just let yourself feel the pain of it. Throw

yourself a pity party, but here's the thing. Only for ten minutes. Allow yourself to cry.

Feel sorry for yourself, entertain all the reasons why you're alone, fantasize over what would

make it better, et cetera. Really go for it. Get all the yucky feelings and judgments out by

writing them down on a piece of paper and then destroying it. Give yourself the opportunity to

experience the pain of your loneliness knowing that you only have ten minutes to indulge.

Once the timer goes off, the pity party is over. Step two, investigate. The negative feelings

that come from being alone stemmed from what you're telling yourself when you're alone.

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